Not that I want to flaunt it into anyone's face....far from it...but it's just an observation on my life....
But everytime I get into a relationship.......the cherry blossoms come in full bloom and tons of other guys finally decide to get onto the "Let's ask Amelia out" bandwagon....and usually...painfully......sadly......a couple of days too late.....GET WIT THE PROGRAM! ACT FAST!
Friday 28 December 2007
Thursday 27 December 2007
It Was A Very Good Year.....
Frankie
When I was seventeen
It was a very good year
It was a very good year for small town girls
And soft summer nights
We'd hide from the lights
On the village green
When I was seventeen
When I was twenty-one
It was a very good year
It was a very good year for city girls
Who lived up the stair
With all that perfumed hair
And it came undone
When I was twenty-one
When I was thirty-five
It was a very good year
It was a very good year for blue-blooded girls
Of independent means
We'd ride in limousines
Their chauffeurs would drive
When I was thirty-five
But now the days grow short
I'm in the autumn of the year
And now I think of my life as vintage wine
From fine old kegs
From the brim to the dregs
And it poured sweet and clear
It was a very good year
It was a mess of good years
Happy New Year everyone! Hope you had a good one. Happy 2008 to come.
When I was seventeen
It was a very good year
It was a very good year for small town girls
And soft summer nights
We'd hide from the lights
On the village green
When I was seventeen
When I was twenty-one
It was a very good year
It was a very good year for city girls
Who lived up the stair
With all that perfumed hair
And it came undone
When I was twenty-one
When I was thirty-five
It was a very good year
It was a very good year for blue-blooded girls
Of independent means
We'd ride in limousines
Their chauffeurs would drive
When I was thirty-five
But now the days grow short
I'm in the autumn of the year
And now I think of my life as vintage wine
From fine old kegs
From the brim to the dregs
And it poured sweet and clear
It was a very good year
It was a mess of good years
Happy New Year everyone! Hope you had a good one. Happy 2008 to come.
Saturday 22 December 2007
SM Town Audition downer....
Right...SM Entertainment...the lovely people who gave you BOA, Dong Bang Shen Ki and KangTa...were in town yesterday to hold their global auditions...
Needless to say...lie a good little starlet wanna be...I went......waited for 3 hours....and was late for work....Thankfully the lovely and ever compassionate Queen Leen was there to help me out and be Santa Rina for a day........I LOVE YOU SHER LEEN!!!
And needless to say since I'm not jumping of furniture........I didn't get in.......I'm not going to go..."but it was so short!" coz that's hog wash to a certain extent.......I'm just not what they are looking for......I don't have what they consitute as 'star quality'.
But does that mean I'll give up? HECK NO! There's still Taiwan.........and if not, the westerns.....Singapore and finally.....Malaysia.........
It's just....too bad my mom won't be able to point at a photo of her and KangTa and say...."Oh, my daughter is KangTa's 师妹。 "
Coz my mom thought KangTa was cute....which is surprising since she thinks F4 are so 'gay'.....gay as in look like girls.....but she does know what gay means......
Anyways.....c'est la vie.......it's their loss.........coz I'm going to be a super star......
I have to.....
Coz it's the only thing, I've got.
Needless to say...lie a good little starlet wanna be...I went......waited for 3 hours....and was late for work....Thankfully the lovely and ever compassionate Queen Leen was there to help me out and be Santa Rina for a day........I LOVE YOU SHER LEEN!!!
And needless to say since I'm not jumping of furniture........I didn't get in.......I'm not going to go..."but it was so short!" coz that's hog wash to a certain extent.......I'm just not what they are looking for......I don't have what they consitute as 'star quality'.
But does that mean I'll give up? HECK NO! There's still Taiwan.........and if not, the westerns.....Singapore and finally.....Malaysia.........
It's just....too bad my mom won't be able to point at a photo of her and KangTa and say...."Oh, my daughter is KangTa's 师妹。 "
Coz my mom thought KangTa was cute....which is surprising since she thinks F4 are so 'gay'.....gay as in look like girls.....but she does know what gay means......
Anyways.....c'est la vie.......it's their loss.........coz I'm going to be a super star......
I have to.....
Coz it's the only thing, I've got.
Thursday 20 December 2007
Streak
I'm on a roll......finally getting into the groove of consistently updating my blog...woohoo!
20 days into the birthday month and I'm up by 14 posts....alright.......and all this despite the insane job and daily insanity/drama of life......
Just finished baking cupcakes...choco brownie cupcakes...hope they're edible...the eggs were a bit...old......but they looked okay...and...oh I didn't smell them...but they should be fine....I swear they are!!
The Shirt's Christmas Party / Winter Solstice Gathering at mine is this Sat......Alyson's coming over Friday to make desserts.....Exchanging mystery gifts by Secret Santas and getting absolutely plastered playing Sos Chocolat.....
Going for SM Entertainment's Global Audition tomorrow.......wish me luck.......going to watch The Illusion tomorrow.......hopefully I'll be able to flee work in time........
Work's inane...but it's alright.......
Life is.
ps: Sorry if the term Shirts offends you guys...just lemme know........I say that coz well......most of you work in shirts and from 9-5!!!
20 days into the birthday month and I'm up by 14 posts....alright.......and all this despite the insane job and daily insanity/drama of life......
Just finished baking cupcakes...choco brownie cupcakes...hope they're edible...the eggs were a bit...old......but they looked okay...and...oh I didn't smell them...but they should be fine....I swear they are!!
The Shirt's Christmas Party / Winter Solstice Gathering at mine is this Sat......Alyson's coming over Friday to make desserts.....Exchanging mystery gifts by Secret Santas and getting absolutely plastered playing Sos Chocolat.....
Going for SM Entertainment's Global Audition tomorrow.......wish me luck.......going to watch The Illusion tomorrow.......hopefully I'll be able to flee work in time........
Work's inane...but it's alright.......
Life is.
ps: Sorry if the term Shirts offends you guys...just lemme know........I say that coz well......most of you work in shirts and from 9-5!!!
Wednesday 19 December 2007
Of Wrenches and Benefactors.....
Right.......new revelations regarding Jom Improv is putting major gum into my plans for Joseph Gordon-Levitt stalking and Rufus Sewell drooling come Jan. As in possible, no go status. Mai hasn't gotten back to me about changing plans...but I don't think she can do it.......ARGH! Somehow I'm tempted to go all conspiracy theory on this one.....but let's not......
I REALLY WANT TO GO TO NEW YORK!!!! PLEASE GODDESS PLEASE!!!! I BEG YOU!!!!! LET ME GO!!!!!!!!! LET. ME. GO!!!!!!!
And speaking of gumming the works....I seem to be the wrench in someone else's works.......or at least, an unforeseen outlier......again....it could be paranoia or me just being perasan.....but hey...it's a nice change from being the "Emma" all the time......
I just have no idea why...but I seem to have this knack.......of match making.....people around me couple up with other people around me.....as is the case with NLD and the chocolate one......and there's the one at work......with frequent antagonist.......chance encounters aren't even beyond my powers! That is my super power Alf.......eck.....
I REALLY WANT TO GO TO NEW YORK!!!! PLEASE GODDESS PLEASE!!!! I BEG YOU!!!!! LET ME GO!!!!!!!!! LET. ME. GO!!!!!!!
And speaking of gumming the works....I seem to be the wrench in someone else's works.......or at least, an unforeseen outlier......again....it could be paranoia or me just being perasan.....but hey...it's a nice change from being the "Emma" all the time......
I just have no idea why...but I seem to have this knack.......of match making.....people around me couple up with other people around me.....as is the case with NLD and the chocolate one......and there's the one at work......with frequent antagonist.......chance encounters aren't even beyond my powers! That is my super power Alf.......eck.....
Sunday 16 December 2007
Snooze Button on Life....
Doing events ain't all it's cracked up to be...the hours are insane so thank goodness the pay is half decent but as my mom pointed out on the phone in her attempt to try and convince me not to go.....my NY flight alone will take up the entire amount and then some...and with my spending habits....I'd be in debt before I even spend the night in New York City......
Right now my life's wake up and try to get to work 'on time'.......wait and surf the net and talk BS till 645pm(weekdays), get dressed in Santa Rina costume that is wwaaayyyy too short for me.....prance around and terrorise giggly condescending teenagers for an hour....get out of Santa Rina outfit.....emcee if Alfred's not there.......and sit there till 10pm.........I can feel my brain cells rotting from lack of stimuli and restful sleep......
Just as my life was hitting cruise.....it's forced into hibernation by gawd knows what impulse.......
Actually....I do know.....A fortune teller or some online reading once said I didn't know how to appreciate the opportunities presented to me.......and people actually gave me chances all the time but I never took them....so this is one of those times when I throw caution to the wind and grabbed opportunity by the balls......coz, come on.......really.....I barely know Alfred.....known him for all of 5 hours.....the biggest thing we had in common was we were both bums........and the next thing I know...I'm throwing my December away....MY FAVOURITE MONTH OF THE ENTIRE YEAR!!!.....working it off.........WHAT THE FUCK GOT INTO ME???!!!
At least I'm taking 2 days off next week and seeing Fai on Monday...I swear that is what is partially getting me through the week.....and a slight increase, in what I hope is, game at work.....hahha........more on that in another post...........and of course...the thought that this is paying for my trip to New York in another......heck...that's getting me through the entire month!!
Right now my life's wake up and try to get to work 'on time'.......wait and surf the net and talk BS till 645pm(weekdays), get dressed in Santa Rina costume that is wwaaayyyy too short for me.....prance around and terrorise giggly condescending teenagers for an hour....get out of Santa Rina outfit.....emcee if Alfred's not there.......and sit there till 10pm.........I can feel my brain cells rotting from lack of stimuli and restful sleep......
Just as my life was hitting cruise.....it's forced into hibernation by gawd knows what impulse.......
Actually....I do know.....A fortune teller or some online reading once said I didn't know how to appreciate the opportunities presented to me.......and people actually gave me chances all the time but I never took them....so this is one of those times when I throw caution to the wind and grabbed opportunity by the balls......coz, come on.......really.....I barely know Alfred.....known him for all of 5 hours.....the biggest thing we had in common was we were both bums........and the next thing I know...I'm throwing my December away....MY FAVOURITE MONTH OF THE ENTIRE YEAR!!!.....working it off.........WHAT THE FUCK GOT INTO ME???!!!
At least I'm taking 2 days off next week and seeing Fai on Monday...I swear that is what is partially getting me through the week.....and a slight increase, in what I hope is, game at work.....hahha........more on that in another post...........and of course...the thought that this is paying for my trip to New York in another......heck...that's getting me through the entire month!!
Thursday 13 December 2007
MNG Sale
Nothing warms the cockles of my conceited narcissistic heart more than hearing the words....
"She looks good it thatlah....how come I can't pull it off wan?"
Simple....I'm half a clothes horse.....deal with it.....
In other news, I bought an MNG 3/4 Brit-looking double breasted coat for 50%....@ RM235.
And No.....I'm not that humble.......
"She looks good it thatlah....how come I can't pull it off wan?"
Simple....I'm half a clothes horse.....deal with it.....
In other news, I bought an MNG 3/4 Brit-looking double breasted coat for 50%....@ RM235.
And No.....I'm not that humble.......
Life Sdn Bhd
Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get.
No matter how much you try and plan out your life, something will happen to upset your plans....so what do you do when life gives you lemons? You make pink lemonade.
I was suppose to be in Taiwan by now. But due to my procrastinating nature and certain other factors, I'm still here in good old racially-tolerant Malaysia.Plans to Taiwan were pushed back to March next year......have no been pushed back to April or indefinitely......now that sounds familiar....pretty soon I'll be going down Fai's path and screwing it altogether.......okay maybe not...
But staying back has been a good thing. I'm now doing a job that'll hopefully earn me enough to get me to New York next year. I've made new friends and achieved my long time goal of being a party animal with some of them. I've finally gone for casting and gone for a couple of auditions with a big one with SM Entertainment happening next week. I've landed a role in a formal theatre production, albeit a vignette but hey...it's something....Chua's finally out of the army so I can finally try and drag his ass up here for real. Ain's back from Tazzie for hols and Cindy's coming back on Sunday.
Fai said something yesterday during some point of the morning while we were talking about my plans......go with the flow, that's what I'm doing......something someone else said once too....
Go with the flow...so that's what I'll do........go with the flow.......
No matter how much you try and plan out your life, something will happen to upset your plans....so what do you do when life gives you lemons? You make pink lemonade.
I was suppose to be in Taiwan by now. But due to my procrastinating nature and certain other factors, I'm still here in good old racially-tolerant Malaysia.Plans to Taiwan were pushed back to March next year......have no been pushed back to April or indefinitely......now that sounds familiar....pretty soon I'll be going down Fai's path and screwing it altogether.......okay maybe not...
But staying back has been a good thing. I'm now doing a job that'll hopefully earn me enough to get me to New York next year. I've made new friends and achieved my long time goal of being a party animal with some of them. I've finally gone for casting and gone for a couple of auditions with a big one with SM Entertainment happening next week. I've landed a role in a formal theatre production, albeit a vignette but hey...it's something....Chua's finally out of the army so I can finally try and drag his ass up here for real. Ain's back from Tazzie for hols and Cindy's coming back on Sunday.
Fai said something yesterday during some point of the morning while we were talking about my plans......go with the flow, that's what I'm doing......something someone else said once too....
Go with the flow...so that's what I'll do........go with the flow.......
Saturday 8 December 2007
我的故事 .....
你在哪 ?
我等你等的好辛苦噢 。
我等的人会是谁
作词：林怡芬 作曲：李□菘 编曲：Terence Teo
我的故事 也许比较特别 走过的路 也许比较迂回
黑暗之中 全凭著直觉 Keep my faith watch my steps
一步步 靠直觉
也许有天 生命中会出现 那一个谁走进我的心里面
他不必是个Mr. Perfect 只要他 善良体贴 be my friend and be my soul mate
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现 Make me whole make me brave
我等的人会是谁 不急在眼前 I can wait I will Pray
也许有天 生命中会出现 那一个谁走进我的心里面
他不必是个Mr. Perfect 只要他 善良体贴 be my friend and be my soul mate
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现 Make me whole make me brave
我等的人会是谁 希望他了解 不管迷惘或坚决 都是我的某一面
我并不追求完美 只要能 用心体会 每一天 都是Better day
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现 Make me whole make me brave
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现 陪著我 一天一点
让生命 能变得更美
Sung by Renee 陳嘉唯
English translation for the Chinese challenged...
Who will be the one I'm waiting for?
My story may be a bit different, the roads I have taken more winding,
In the dark, all is guided by intuition; Keep my faith, watch my steps,
Step by step, guided by intuition.
Maybe one day in my life there will be, someone who will walk into my heart,
He doesn't have to be a Mr Perfect, only to be kind and affectionate; be my friend and be my soul mate.
Who will be the one I am waiting for? When will he appear? Make me whole, make me brave,
Who will be the one I am waiting for? There is no need for haste; I can wait, I will pray.
Maybe one day in my life there will be, someone who will walk into my heart,
He doesn't have to be a Mr Perfect, only to be kind and affectionate; be my friend and be my soul mate.
Who will be the one I am waiting for? When will he appear? Make me whole, make me brave,
Who will be the one I am waiting for? I hope he understands, no matter the uncertainty or determination, they are all facets of me,
I don't ask for perfection, only to be truly understood, everyday is a better day.
Who will be the one I am waiting for? When will he appear? Make me whole, make me brave,
Who will be the one I am waiting for? When will he appear? To stand by me, a day a moment, so that life can be more beautiful.
Sung by Renee Chan Jia-Wei
我等你等的好辛苦噢 。
我等的人会是谁
作词：林怡芬 作曲：李□菘 编曲：Terence Teo
我的故事 也许比较特别 走过的路 也许比较迂回
黑暗之中 全凭著直觉 Keep my faith watch my steps
一步步 靠直觉
也许有天 生命中会出现 那一个谁走进我的心里面
他不必是个Mr. Perfect 只要他 善良体贴 be my friend and be my soul mate
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现 Make me whole make me brave
我等的人会是谁 不急在眼前 I can wait I will Pray
也许有天 生命中会出现 那一个谁走进我的心里面
他不必是个Mr. Perfect 只要他 善良体贴 be my friend and be my soul mate
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现 Make me whole make me brave
我等的人会是谁 希望他了解 不管迷惘或坚决 都是我的某一面
我并不追求完美 只要能 用心体会 每一天 都是Better day
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现 Make me whole make me brave
我等的人会是谁 何时才出现 陪著我 一天一点
让生命 能变得更美
Sung by Renee 陳嘉唯
English translation for the Chinese challenged...
Who will be the one I'm waiting for?
My story may be a bit different, the roads I have taken more winding,
In the dark, all is guided by intuition; Keep my faith, watch my steps,
Step by step, guided by intuition.
Maybe one day in my life there will be, someone who will walk into my heart,
He doesn't have to be a Mr Perfect, only to be kind and affectionate; be my friend and be my soul mate.
Who will be the one I am waiting for? When will he appear? Make me whole, make me brave,
Who will be the one I am waiting for? There is no need for haste; I can wait, I will pray.
Maybe one day in my life there will be, someone who will walk into my heart,
He doesn't have to be a Mr Perfect, only to be kind and affectionate; be my friend and be my soul mate.
Who will be the one I am waiting for? When will he appear? Make me whole, make me brave,
Who will be the one I am waiting for? I hope he understands, no matter the uncertainty or determination, they are all facets of me,
I don't ask for perfection, only to be truly understood, everyday is a better day.
Who will be the one I am waiting for? When will he appear? Make me whole, make me brave,
Who will be the one I am waiting for? When will he appear? To stand by me, a day a moment, so that life can be more beautiful.
Sung by Renee Chan Jia-Wei
Unfinished
The truth of the matter is...last year at the last day of Satu Kali which was canceled....me and D were there as you and her were walking out. D thought she was cute.....
I thought you were cute...I knew what you both were.
Yet I said to D, you tackle the girl, I tackle the guy........
----------------------
People are saying I look like her.......but frankly, I don't even know what she looks like.....someone said that I should get to know her......but I never saw the point. I still don't. I don't see the need.
Because......I am not her. And never will be.
Is that why I don't have your eye anymore? Or was it the reason I caught it in the first place?
I thought you were cute...I knew what you both were.
Yet I said to D, you tackle the girl, I tackle the guy........
----------------------
People are saying I look like her.......but frankly, I don't even know what she looks like.....someone said that I should get to know her......but I never saw the point. I still don't. I don't see the need.
Because......I am not her. And never will be.
Is that why I don't have your eye anymore? Or was it the reason I caught it in the first place?
Wednesday 5 December 2007
Slog......
Woke up at 750 this morning and hauled ass to The Curve......doing events ain't fun...at least it's paying relatively well.......but my social life's just took a hike....no more clubbing every other night..and definitely no more Lapsap.......DAMN!
Still, I'm popping by Twilight Action Girl this Friday as a send off to Daphne and Hanic who I've only met once a week ago......pretty nice of Daphne to invite me to her farewell....
But gawd....this job is so damn tiring...11-10 everyday......and the dressing up as Santa Rina...cari makan kan?? Argh the things we do for money........
I just need to look at this as being a major contribution to the New York flight fund......expenses can come out of my own coffers.....thank goodness accommodation's on Jim......now to find out where JGL hangs and we're set! Hahaha.....
With KLPac roping me in to do Johann's play, there's no hope of me doing an all-American trip....was hoping I could perhaps swing by Cali and Nevada somehow......but oh well....
Doing Johann's play tho....will set Taiwan plays back again by either another 3 months or till April....I might just go for Cultural Uni's Mandarin course instead of CLD's.......coz I mean....the point is to get signed right? So it doesn't really matter where I study......
Urgh......I need sleep.......for some unknown reason, I haven't been getting enough sleep......either that or accumilation of toxins....so need to use Kinohimitsu.......argh....I just want this whole thing to be over......
Good news tho....it looks like I only have to be Santa Rina till the 23rd...YAY!! Now quickly make it the 23rd!!
Still, I'm popping by Twilight Action Girl this Friday as a send off to Daphne and Hanic who I've only met once a week ago......pretty nice of Daphne to invite me to her farewell....
But gawd....this job is so damn tiring...11-10 everyday......and the dressing up as Santa Rina...cari makan kan?? Argh the things we do for money........
I just need to look at this as being a major contribution to the New York flight fund......expenses can come out of my own coffers.....thank goodness accommodation's on Jim......now to find out where JGL hangs and we're set! Hahaha.....
With KLPac roping me in to do Johann's play, there's no hope of me doing an all-American trip....was hoping I could perhaps swing by Cali and Nevada somehow......but oh well....
Doing Johann's play tho....will set Taiwan plays back again by either another 3 months or till April....I might just go for Cultural Uni's Mandarin course instead of CLD's.......coz I mean....the point is to get signed right? So it doesn't really matter where I study......
Urgh......I need sleep.......for some unknown reason, I haven't been getting enough sleep......either that or accumilation of toxins....so need to use Kinohimitsu.......argh....I just want this whole thing to be over......
Good news tho....it looks like I only have to be Santa Rina till the 23rd...YAY!! Now quickly make it the 23rd!!
Tuesday 4 December 2007
Less e(quals)-mo(re)
I've come to the conclusion that I need to listen to more of my happy music.....
As well as watch less emo shows.....like Grey's or even.....Brick.....
How is Brick emo? Come on......Brendan's looking for the person who got his ex-girlfriend-who-he's-still-in-love-with killed......how is that not emo? Plus it's an indie film....the style in itself, implies emoness.....Also, lusting after a currently unattainable Joseph Gordon-Levitt.....cannot be healthy and doing anything for the soul....
I need to nourish my soul......I need a holiday....a vacation from my brain....from being me....I need to go where nobody knows my name...I need to go where my mind can be free and wonder....wonder the corridors of your life.....see the world through your eyes.......feel the world through your skin.....I need to be
away
from me.....
As well as watch less emo shows.....like Grey's or even.....Brick.....
How is Brick emo? Come on......Brendan's looking for the person who got his ex-girlfriend-who-he's-still-in-love-with killed......how is that not emo? Plus it's an indie film....the style in itself, implies emoness.....Also, lusting after a currently unattainable Joseph Gordon-Levitt.....cannot be healthy and doing anything for the soul....
I need to nourish my soul......I need a holiday....a vacation from my brain....from being me....I need to go where nobody knows my name...I need to go where my mind can be free and wonder....wonder the corridors of your life.....see the world through your eyes.......feel the world through your skin.....I need to be
away
from me.....
Cupcakes and the field of dreams.....
Damnit! Someone's beat me to my cupcake idea of a cafe whose main focus is cupcakes.......tho...it's not like I was gonna do it now...or that no one's done it before.......I mean...I was kind of inspired by Marmalade.......anyways....I've checked out the competition's cupcakes....they are........quite good....they might give my future business a run for its' money...or should it be that I will give them a run for their money....I happen to think that my chocolate cupcakes are more chocolatey.....
Tho...whose to say that cupcakes will still be the 'in' thing when it comes time for me to set up shop? I mean....cupcakes are all the rage right now...but what about in 5 years time? heck...even 2 years! will they still be 'in'?
Tho...whose to say that cupcakes will still be the 'in' thing when it comes time for me to set up shop? I mean....cupcakes are all the rage right now...but what about in 5 years time? heck...even 2 years! will they still be 'in'?
Monday 3 December 2007
Fame Academy Season 1 Re-Visited - Sinead Quinn
I Can't Break Down
Now I know I can handle this
I'll close my mouth and clench my fist
I've lived this day in a thousand ways
But there's a flaw to add to my list
Go on squeeze a little more
If you scream I'll just ignore you
I've rehearsed this scene in a million dreams
You're getting closer to my core
I'm so damn frustrated
Losing breath and now I'm shaking
Gotta keep myself from breaking down
Someone get me out
Tear don't you fall
Eyes don't you cry
Need to get me round this corner
I can't break down, break down
Pride don't cave in
Head don't let go
While I'm open and you can read me
I can't break down, break down
I've locked it out for long enough
Got really good at playing rough now
I've been prepared
And not really cared
For being brave is getting tough
Chin now don't you quiver
Hands don't start to shiver
Gotta keep myself from breaking down
Someone get me out, someone let me out
You smile like the cat that's got the cream
I'm vulnerable and I know you see me
There's so much I wanna say
But this lump in my throat makes me walk away
Away, Away
Tear don't you fall
Eyes don't you cry
Pride don't cave in
Head don't let go
Break down, I can't break down
Dedicated to Mai.
Now I know I can handle this
I'll close my mouth and clench my fist
I've lived this day in a thousand ways
But there's a flaw to add to my list
Go on squeeze a little more
If you scream I'll just ignore you
I've rehearsed this scene in a million dreams
You're getting closer to my core
I'm so damn frustrated
Losing breath and now I'm shaking
Gotta keep myself from breaking down
Someone get me out
Tear don't you fall
Eyes don't you cry
Need to get me round this corner
I can't break down, break down
Pride don't cave in
Head don't let go
While I'm open and you can read me
I can't break down, break down
I've locked it out for long enough
Got really good at playing rough now
I've been prepared
And not really cared
For being brave is getting tough
Chin now don't you quiver
Hands don't start to shiver
Gotta keep myself from breaking down
Someone get me out, someone let me out
You smile like the cat that's got the cream
I'm vulnerable and I know you see me
There's so much I wanna say
But this lump in my throat makes me walk away
Away, Away
Tear don't you fall
Eyes don't you cry
Pride don't cave in
Head don't let go
Break down, I can't break down
Dedicated to Mai.
Fame Academy Season 1 Re-Visited - Ainslie Henderson
Keep Me A Secret
I'm trying not to feel you
But you just brushed by
And if you dare to cross that line you know
My toes would step on fire
Ohh sizzle when it's face on face
And skin on skin
I'm trying to keep you out
And I'm trying to keep me in
One hundred million eyes
Behind these walls
Watching you
Hearing you
Knowing you
Keep me a secret
Keep me out your arms
Keep my kisses off your lipstick
Stop me swallowing your charms
Keep yourself a secret
Lock up all your doors
I'll keep you out of my dreams
Just you keep me out of yours
Needn't not to notice you
But you grab my eye
Don't let embraces linger
Try to keep our arms untied
See there you go again
You're making me mad
'Cos I'm drawn to this danger
Oh, it's making me mad
One hundred million reasons to ignore
Of wanting to be with you
One hundred million eyes
Behind these walls
Watching you
Hearing you
Knowing you
Keep me a secret
Keep me out your arms
Keep my kisses off your lipstick
Stop me swallowing your charms
Keep yourself a secret
Lock up all your doors
I'll keep you out of my dreams
Just you keep me out of yours
All I'm asking is for nothing
And if nothing is enough for you
Oh leave it I said keep you inside your head
Under your breath
Keep me a secret
Keep me out your arms
Keep my kisses off your lipstick
Stop me swallowing your charms
Keep yourself a secret
Lock up all your doors
I'll keep you out of my dreams
Just you keep me out of yours
Dedicated to my smoking angel army.
I'm trying not to feel you
But you just brushed by
And if you dare to cross that line you know
My toes would step on fire
Ohh sizzle when it's face on face
And skin on skin
I'm trying to keep you out
And I'm trying to keep me in
One hundred million eyes
Behind these walls
Watching you
Hearing you
Knowing you
Keep me a secret
Keep me out your arms
Keep my kisses off your lipstick
Stop me swallowing your charms
Keep yourself a secret
Lock up all your doors
I'll keep you out of my dreams
Just you keep me out of yours
Needn't not to notice you
But you grab my eye
Don't let embraces linger
Try to keep our arms untied
See there you go again
You're making me mad
'Cos I'm drawn to this danger
Oh, it's making me mad
One hundred million reasons to ignore
Of wanting to be with you
One hundred million eyes
Behind these walls
Watching you
Hearing you
Knowing you
Keep me a secret
Keep me out your arms
Keep my kisses off your lipstick
Stop me swallowing your charms
Keep yourself a secret
Lock up all your doors
I'll keep you out of my dreams
Just you keep me out of yours
All I'm asking is for nothing
And if nothing is enough for you
Oh leave it I said keep you inside your head
Under your breath
Keep me a secret
Keep me out your arms
Keep my kisses off your lipstick
Stop me swallowing your charms
Keep yourself a secret
Lock up all your doors
I'll keep you out of my dreams
Just you keep me out of yours
Dedicated to my smoking angel army.
Fame Academy Season 1 Re-Visited - David Sneddon
Stop Living The Lie
He sits alone at a table in a small cafe
Drowning his tears in a bottomless cup of coffee
And hes tumbling into his thoughts
His memories are all tied in knots
And who is going to save him
No one wants to know him
She stands alone in a place where no one knows her name
She catches them staring they turn around and vanish the frame
And shes nursing her head and her pride
She died long ago deep down inside
And who is going to save her
No one wants to know her
I can't believe that you'd pull on a sleeve when you cry
You stick in the knife then give the kiss of life
Live the lie
And we all have a saviour
So do yourself a favour
Stop living the lie
He sits alone and looks up to the eyes of an angel
She catches him staring and smiles the smile of an angel
And she asks him if this chair is free
He said yes will you sit here with me
No one would have saved him
We should all learn from them
Lie.... lie.... stop livin the lie
Dedicated, to me.
He sits alone at a table in a small cafe
Drowning his tears in a bottomless cup of coffee
And hes tumbling into his thoughts
His memories are all tied in knots
And who is going to save him
No one wants to know him
She stands alone in a place where no one knows her name
She catches them staring they turn around and vanish the frame
And shes nursing her head and her pride
She died long ago deep down inside
And who is going to save her
No one wants to know her
I can't believe that you'd pull on a sleeve when you cry
You stick in the knife then give the kiss of life
Live the lie
And we all have a saviour
So do yourself a favour
Stop living the lie
He sits alone and looks up to the eyes of an angel
She catches him staring and smiles the smile of an angel
And she asks him if this chair is free
He said yes will you sit here with me
No one would have saved him
We should all learn from them
Lie.... lie.... stop livin the lie
Dedicated, to me.
Brand New Day.....Brand New Year.....
The start of the new year....the year I turn 24.........
Wish I could say that I'm a new person from the person I was a year ago....But just barely....
I'm not really that different.
I still want the same things....Yearn for the same experiences.....Pine for the same.....
Sure, I've met new people, done new things, accomplished (or should I say finish) things that are long over due....but despite all of it...essentially I am still that same person I was a year ago...
Not much has changed....I don't feel different...perhaps, even.....I feel worse.....I'm getting older, but not necessarily wiser.
I still make stupid mistakes. Hurt myself in the same ways. Make the same mistakes...and even bigger mistakes.....
Aside from graduating college, I have no accomplishments to boast of. And the future is not really all that bright and cheery as I usually make it out to be.......It's dark, uncertain and most importantly perhaps, now, alone.
My soul mate, is no more.
Spare a tear for the wicked.......
Me.
Wish I could say that I'm a new person from the person I was a year ago....But just barely....
I'm not really that different.
I still want the same things....Yearn for the same experiences.....Pine for the same.....
Sure, I've met new people, done new things, accomplished (or should I say finish) things that are long over due....but despite all of it...essentially I am still that same person I was a year ago...
Not much has changed....I don't feel different...perhaps, even.....I feel worse.....I'm getting older, but not necessarily wiser.
I still make stupid mistakes. Hurt myself in the same ways. Make the same mistakes...and even bigger mistakes.....
Aside from graduating college, I have no accomplishments to boast of. And the future is not really all that bright and cheery as I usually make it out to be.......It's dark, uncertain and most importantly perhaps, now, alone.
My soul mate, is no more.
Spare a tear for the wicked.......
Me.
Saturday 1 December 2007
Pang
I stumbled across a photo.....and felt a sudden pang....a falling out of the heart, like the chest cavity hollowed out and it dropped straight into a pit....... hurt? pain? guilt? I don't know.....loss perhaps....of fleeting moments.....
I thought I was over it....apparently not......Emotionally....I am not as strong as I seem to be...I cry behind closed doors......or behind a facade...I cry inside....I hurt, I bleed......Not many people know me...the real me.......the only person who glimpsed an inkling, has since left me......Destiny has yet again dealt me the Hermit card........
Do not offer me the chance of redemption....Do not offer me a glimpse of what is on the other side....Do not show me constant reminders of what I lack......Do not send your messengers and heralds.....Do not tempt me with your little smoking angel army........Do not.......Stop......
I thought I was over it....apparently not......Emotionally....I am not as strong as I seem to be...I cry behind closed doors......or behind a facade...I cry inside....I hurt, I bleed......Not many people know me...the real me.......the only person who glimpsed an inkling, has since left me......Destiny has yet again dealt me the Hermit card........
Do not offer me the chance of redemption....Do not offer me a glimpse of what is on the other side....Do not show me constant reminders of what I lack......Do not send your messengers and heralds.....Do not tempt me with your little smoking angel army........Do not.......Stop......
"I have a woman's body, and a child's emotion."
-Elizabeth Taylor
@}-',-
-Elizabeth Taylor
@}-',-
ps: what a way to start my birthday month.....and end the year....
Thursday 29 November 2007
Eden Tradition
Tak tau kenapa, tapi.....whenever it comes to celebratory dinners....the place to go for the family....still remains to be Eden.....and almost without fail, I'll order the Lobster Thermidore.....despite my dislike for things creamy.......it's like tradition kan?
Week of Justin....
I thought I'd be seeing a lot of Fai this week....what with meeting up with him on Monday...then maybe dropping by to see him model at Zouk tomorrow, then seeing him at the 50 Gorgeous Paty this Sat.....not to mention maybe dropping by his show earlier tonight.......but nope.....since I stayed out 'late'(midnight!!! only!!!) tonight.....I 'can't' (read shouldn't) stay out late tomorrow.....and since I didn't eventually go see him tonight...it's down to 2 Justin sightings......but then I could just drop by his place on Friday to get music from him....so it'd just up the Justin met-o-meter to 3........
Now why the sudden good girl act? The parental unit has rolled into town...just as a plethora of Twilight Action Girl and Lapsap events kicks itself into high gear.......damnit!.....then thank goodness I wasted my Masquerade Party tickets and didn't go tonight huh........jeez....and how am I suppose to see Z tomorrow to get my stuff back...have to drop by Annexelah now.........or is it just an excuse.....do I really want to go? I don't know.....It seems in my Facebook events, I had listed it as a 'Maybe Attending'......so perhaps I had originally found the premise interesting....I don't know...but I told Z I wasn't going...but that was before coming home late today and after the parental unit making noise about this girl being abducted while on her way to work in Glenmarie and telling me not to stay out so late........
But really......if the girl's being abducted in broad daylight....does it matter what time I go out or come back?
But speaking of Fai...it reminds me...I need to looks for a commissioner of oaths for him....eh EuGene, SS2 / our area got Commissioner of oaths ar?
Now why the sudden good girl act? The parental unit has rolled into town...just as a plethora of Twilight Action Girl and Lapsap events kicks itself into high gear.......damnit!.....then thank goodness I wasted my Masquerade Party tickets and didn't go tonight huh........jeez....and how am I suppose to see Z tomorrow to get my stuff back...have to drop by Annexelah now.........or is it just an excuse.....do I really want to go? I don't know.....It seems in my Facebook events, I had listed it as a 'Maybe Attending'......so perhaps I had originally found the premise interesting....I don't know...but I told Z I wasn't going...but that was before coming home late today and after the parental unit making noise about this girl being abducted while on her way to work in Glenmarie and telling me not to stay out so late........
But really......if the girl's being abducted in broad daylight....does it matter what time I go out or come back?
But speaking of Fai...it reminds me...I need to looks for a commissioner of oaths for him....eh EuGene, SS2 / our area got Commissioner of oaths ar?
Monday 26 November 2007
Work......?
Finally......went for casting today.....I just decided to do it.....dragged woke myself up in the 'morning'....checked email and facebook, dragged myself away from cyberspace......slapped on some makeup.......and got my ass over to Cheese......Steven..I think that's his name...the boss.....still remembers me from last time...like 6 years ago.....well....recognizes maybe not exactly remember....but hey...how to forget a face like mine? A pure chinese who looks like a mat salleh celup? can you use that for chinese? Anyways...so hopefully work will start coming in soon......fingers crossed....
So anyways.....after the casting...the issue of my cina-purebred-yet-mat-salleh-celup looks stuck with me...as is always the case since every photog who takes my photo can never resist asking...."You mixed ar?" ........it made me think about giving more of an identity to my rock star alter-ego, Layla........I've decided to make her Japanese German......and fully name her...either Layla Satoshi, as a nod back to my chinese name....or Layla Fuyu, a reference to winter which I thought great at the time...but in retrospect...not so great....Japanese German....do you think I could pull it off? I think so....I've got the Japanese one down pat...they say that already...slap on some coloured contacts and we just might be able to convince 'em on the Germanic heritage too....
In other news.....I watched a local film today....and I felt like walking out half way and perhaps even eating my own arm to just keep from shouting at the f-ing screen........I went to watch Orang Minyak.....which stars one of my junior from DPA, Sharifah Sofia......Sofia, Sofia, Sofia....KENAPA??!!!!! WHY??!!! Tuk cari makan....please say untuk cari makan....coz it was a shit as film! The sound guy should either be sacked or one should be ihred coz the entire film was voice-overed....the DOP(director of photography) or cameraman should stop fiddling with the aperture of the camera during close-up and mid-shots like he's wanking off....it's either that or he's just telling us that the wall and the extras are more interesting than what's going on in the story, which is true coz I have never had to listen to so much contrived shit dialogue in a long long time........kalau bukan untuk Sofia........gawd help me......Kenapa I put myself through shit like that??!!! Alhamdulillah that I actually make it a point for my dialogue to make sense...as boring as they perhaps may be......My gawd.....is this the state of Malaysian cinema? Stories and dialogues that don't make sense and too many jump cuts...not to mention the unbelievably lack on continuity and production design that makes sense.......I know you cannot show/film a butt naked man in a Malay film...tapi in one frame your orang minyak is in a body suit and the next he's in 3/4 pants??? ARE YOU STUPID? OR DO YOU THINK YOU'RE AUDIENCE IS???
And also in the realm of cinema....30 Days of Night was not as bad as I feared it might be.....heck as far as films on this genre goes....it's was better than Skinwalkers and Blood & Chocolate. Skinwalkers now there was a whole load of crap......
So anyways.....after the casting...the issue of my cina-purebred-yet-mat-salleh-celup looks stuck with me...as is always the case since every photog who takes my photo can never resist asking...."You mixed ar?" ........it made me think about giving more of an identity to my rock star alter-ego, Layla........I've decided to make her Japanese German......and fully name her...either Layla Satoshi, as a nod back to my chinese name....or Layla Fuyu, a reference to winter which I thought great at the time...but in retrospect...not so great....Japanese German....do you think I could pull it off? I think so....I've got the Japanese one down pat...they say that already...slap on some coloured contacts and we just might be able to convince 'em on the Germanic heritage too....
In other news.....I watched a local film today....and I felt like walking out half way and perhaps even eating my own arm to just keep from shouting at the f-ing screen........I went to watch Orang Minyak.....which stars one of my junior from DPA, Sharifah Sofia......Sofia, Sofia, Sofia....KENAPA??!!!!! WHY??!!! Tuk cari makan....please say untuk cari makan....coz it was a shit as film! The sound guy should either be sacked or one should be ihred coz the entire film was voice-overed....the DOP(director of photography) or cameraman should stop fiddling with the aperture of the camera during close-up and mid-shots like he's wanking off....it's either that or he's just telling us that the wall and the extras are more interesting than what's going on in the story, which is true coz I have never had to listen to so much contrived shit dialogue in a long long time........kalau bukan untuk Sofia........gawd help me......Kenapa I put myself through shit like that??!!! Alhamdulillah that I actually make it a point for my dialogue to make sense...as boring as they perhaps may be......My gawd.....is this the state of Malaysian cinema? Stories and dialogues that don't make sense and too many jump cuts...not to mention the unbelievably lack on continuity and production design that makes sense.......I know you cannot show/film a butt naked man in a Malay film...tapi in one frame your orang minyak is in a body suit and the next he's in 3/4 pants??? ARE YOU STUPID? OR DO YOU THINK YOU'RE AUDIENCE IS???
And also in the realm of cinema....30 Days of Night was not as bad as I feared it might be.....heck as far as films on this genre goes....it's was better than Skinwalkers and Blood & Chocolate. Skinwalkers now there was a whole load of crap......
Thursday 22 November 2007
Strange intoxicated nights.....
Been spending a lot of time at Palate Palette lately.....went for my first Lapsap party a couple of weeks ago after Wayang Kata.........then dropped by their Sunday BBQ and Junkyard Sale thing on Sunday....not to mention popping in to see Mal when I was at No Black Tie for Indie Brew........then went for my second Lapsap last night......and then, am right now contemplating dropping by there in a bit for some food before going to see Joy's show at the Annexe.
Lapsap Parties....for me....involve copius amounts of alcohol...which makes for very intoxicated nights....I had fun last night....more fun than I'd had in quite a while.....Then I again...I went there well prepared...stocked up on carbs at Kiku-Zakura while dinner-ing with Ron before watching a flick then heading off to Lapsap.....I think Nur was right when she said, you're never alone at these things.....well coz she's there...plus I knew for a fact Dav Chin and his Far would be there...Mal was a disappointing no show......plus I was there with Ron! so yea.....it was crazy dancing and yummy yummy alcohol.....Girls will like the Bellini Martini and Strawberry Daiquiri (it's frozen!)
And since I'm there so often, here's a Palate Palette plug for this Sunday for good measure....
Lapsap Parties....for me....involve copius amounts of alcohol...which makes for very intoxicated nights....I had fun last night....more fun than I'd had in quite a while.....Then I again...I went there well prepared...stocked up on carbs at Kiku-Zakura while dinner-ing with Ron before watching a flick then heading off to Lapsap.....I think Nur was right when she said, you're never alone at these things.....well coz she's there...plus I knew for a fact Dav Chin and his Far would be there...Mal was a disappointing no show......plus I was there with Ron! so yea.....it was crazy dancing and yummy yummy alcohol.....Girls will like the Bellini Martini and Strawberry Daiquiri (it's frozen!)
And since I'm there so often, here's a Palate Palette plug for this Sunday for good measure....
Bring Your Pet this Sunday (25 Nov)!
On the last Sunday of every month, rain or shine, we welcome all pets…dogs, hamsters, goldfishes, snakes, turtles, parrots… Let them play, but hopefully they don’t bite! J
Whether you want new friends for your pets, or you want to compare notes with (or chat up) other pet owners, or you just can’t bear to part with them, just come!
Collared pets get a free special-personalized-handmade
Plus, it’s also Happy Hours ALL DAY Sunday!
So see you soon!
Pets are always welcome outside during regular times. Owners are responsible for their own pets. If your pet eats someone else’s pet, it’s not our fault! We also love all. Pet-less people welcome.
Palate Palette Restaurant & Bar
21 Jalan Mesui, off Jalan Nagasari, 50200 Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
T : +603 2142 2148 F : +603 2143 2148 www.palatepalette.com
21 Jalan Mesui, off Jalan Nagasari, 50200 Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
T : +603 2142 2148 F : +603 2143 2148 www.palatepalette.com
We are open 12pm – 12am, Fri + Sat until 2am J We close on Mondays L
Looooooong HAPPY HOURS… 12pm – 8pm everyday and ALL DAY Sunday!
Wednesday 21 November 2007
Lunch with Mark...
Lunch with Mark is always......a thought provoking, slightly irksome and highly philosophical experience.......It is disturbing how he always manages to make me question my choices in life.....
It's really a wonder why I let him....when usually, I just dismiss people who make me feel bad about myself.......
It's diabolical.....it's Mark......
Perhaps it's just that I know he's ragging on me only because he cares.......I hope......hahaha
It's really a wonder why I let him....when usually, I just dismiss people who make me feel bad about myself.......
It's diabolical.....it's Mark......
Perhaps it's just that I know he's ragging on me only because he cares.......I hope......hahaha
Tuesday 20 November 2007
Perfect
What do I really need in life....
What's the question that's just popped into my head and I steeled myself for an obligatory "let's-try-and-keep-this-blog-alive" post while sorting thru what Grey's Anatomy picture to out on my Addicted to Grey's Anatomy box on my Facebook profile......
But really.....that is an existentialist like question...and we all know how much I love to sound like an intellectual.........
What do I really need in life......
Okay...perhaps need isn't really the best thing......coz...I mean.....it's really simple,,,straight forward.... everyone needs to be loved, a roof over their heads, and an endless suply of sustenance......
So okay....let me rephrase that for my, not to thinking person existentialist wanna be brain that it is....
What do I really want? In life......out of it......what do I really want.....
It'd be all just fine and dandy to say I want Someone.....but do I really? Why? Do I really want him? Just because he's tall, cute, smart, sarcastic, intellectual and wounded? Yes....wounded...it's like every anime/idol-drama fan's prereq for the guy of your dreams..get a clue...go watch Meteor Garden.... Just because I've developed this emotional connection based on the sparse amount of time I've spent with him? Just because he's was there and seemed to have wanted something of me? Just because I've someone how come I think of him as perfect?
What's the question that's just popped into my head and I steeled myself for an obligatory "let's-try-and-keep-this-blog-alive" post while sorting thru what Grey's Anatomy picture to out on my Addicted to Grey's Anatomy box on my Facebook profile......
But really.....that is an existentialist like question...and we all know how much I love to sound like an intellectual.........
What do I really need in life......
Okay...perhaps need isn't really the best thing......coz...I mean.....it's really simple,,,straight forward.... everyone needs to be loved, a roof over their heads, and an endless suply of sustenance......
So okay....let me rephrase that for my, not to thinking person existentialist wanna be brain that it is....
What do I really want? In life......out of it......what do I really want.....
It'd be all just fine and dandy to say I want Someone.....but do I really? Why? Do I really want him? Just because he's tall, cute, smart, sarcastic, intellectual and wounded? Yes....wounded...it's like every anime/idol-drama fan's prereq for the guy of your dreams..get a clue...go watch Meteor Garden.... Just because I've developed this emotional connection based on the sparse amount of time I've spent with him? Just because he's was there and seemed to have wanted something of me? Just because I've someone how come I think of him as perfect?
Saturday 17 November 2007
I'm with You
I'm With You
Avril Lavigne
I'm standing on a bridge
I'm waitin’ in the dark
I thought that you'd be here by now
There’s nothing but the rain
No footsteps on the ground
I'm listening but there’s no sound
Avril Lavigne
I'm standing on a bridge
I'm waitin’ in the dark
I thought that you'd be here by now
There’s nothing but the rain
No footsteps on the ground
I'm listening but there’s no sound
Isn't anyone tryin’ to find me?
Won't somebody come take me home
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are
But I... I'm with you
I’m looking for a place
Searching for a face
Is anybody here i know
Cause nothings going right
And everything’s a mess
And no one likes to be alone
Isn't anyone tryin’ to find me?
Won't somebody come take me home
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are
but I... I'm with you
Oh why is everything so confusing
Maybe I'm just out of my mind
Yea yea yea
It's a damn cold night
Trying to figure out this life
Wont you take me by the hand
Take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are
But I... I'm with you
Take me by the hand
Take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are
But I... I'm with you
I'm with you
Take me by the hand
Take me somewhere new
I don’t know who you are
But I... I'm with you
I'm with you
I'm with you...
Self-Sabotage and the Existentialist
I think therefore I am.......
Why do I keep doing this to myself? Sabotaging relationships....it's really no wonder I haven't got a love life......it's like a self fulfilling prophesy...I'm just like subconsciously so set in my ways that I just sabotage and pre-empt all attempts by goddess to hook me up. I screw everything up before anything can even happen....Perhaps Terrence was right...a part of me is scared shitless...not his words exactly but you get my drift....
I think therefore I am....... I think therefore it is......I think how could Z ever truly like someone like me? It happens......How could J ever fall in love with me...it happens.....I'm sure to end up alone....it happens......I think therefore, I am.......
Why do I keep doing this to myself? Sabotaging relationships....it's really no wonder I haven't got a love life......it's like a self fulfilling prophesy...I'm just like subconsciously so set in my ways that I just sabotage and pre-empt all attempts by goddess to hook me up. I screw everything up before anything can even happen....Perhaps Terrence was right...a part of me is scared shitless...not his words exactly but you get my drift....
I think therefore I am....... I think therefore it is......I think how could Z ever truly like someone like me? It happens......How could J ever fall in love with me...it happens.....I'm sure to end up alone....it happens......I think therefore, I am.......
Monday 12 November 2007
Apathy - The Death of a Nation
Apathy will be the death of the nation and not the state of the govt as we know it. The lack of involvement by the people of today will ensure that the current power mongers stay in power well into our deaths.
Sure, they might not drive the country literally to it's graves but where's freedom and where is democracy? Where is the power to say what you want against anybody, in the face of their stupidity? Do we really need anymore white elephants and space flight participants?
I was at BERSIH Rally yesterday....and just for the information of the people who've seen the stuff on TV or heard rumours of a riot........it was just a walk....a march if you will....tear gas was sprayed on the crowd...but only the crowd at Masjid Jamek....and guess what?? THEY WERE PEACEFUL.....I wasn't there,I was with the group leaving from Central Market(and damnit....all I got was rain!!)......but the Al Jazeera reporter was..........
Just check out the video......especially when Hamish goes......."this was until a few mintues ago...AN ENTIRELY PEACEFUL PROTEST"....now I don't know about you...but if I got sprayed with a shitload of teargas-laced chemicals...I'd be pissed off too....but they didn't cause a riot anyway.......they just marched on..........
Sure, they might not drive the country literally to it's graves but where's freedom and where is democracy? Where is the power to say what you want against anybody, in the face of their stupidity? Do we really need anymore white elephants and space flight participants?
I was at BERSIH Rally yesterday....and just for the information of the people who've seen the stuff on TV or heard rumours of a riot........it was just a walk....a march if you will....tear gas was sprayed on the crowd...but only the crowd at Masjid Jamek....and guess what?? THEY WERE PEACEFUL.....I wasn't there,I was with the group leaving from Central Market(and damnit....all I got was rain!!)......but the Al Jazeera reporter was..........
Just check out the video......especially when Hamish goes......."this was until a few mintues ago...AN ENTIRELY PEACEFUL PROTEST"....now I don't know about you...but if I got sprayed with a shitload of teargas-laced chemicals...I'd be pissed off too....but they didn't cause a riot anyway.......they just marched on..........
Wednesday 7 November 2007
Rest
For some unknown reason. I have this sudden need to...get away from it all....spend the last of my hard earned cash on a spa getaway and abso-fuckin-lutely paper myself.......trouble is...I'd prolly get bored on the second day...well....maybe not but I'd be pretty worried about blowing all that moolah....
But really, I don't know why? Heaven knows I just got back from Singapore, tho the trip wasn't what I would call relaxing......the total bereft-ness of a tv in my hotel room is enough to stress me out right there.....but I digress.....
Perhaps it's the fact that I have a schedule now........Jap classes and rehearsals every Tuesday and Thursday....it basically locks up the entire day....coz by the time I drag myself out of bed, it's already 11-12......get ready for class....then makan after class......potter around for a bit, but i'm ussually too zonked out to potter.....so I veg, which induces more laziness and general bleghness....then it's off to rehearsals...which there seems to be an unsettling recurring pattern but let's not rant......so that leaves the weekend and odd days free....but with so many invites to stuff...and potential gatherings....it's a bit dizzy- and tire-making....with little time to recoup.....so....urgh.....
But that's life after college.......and I'm not even working a 9-5...I'm being more of a socialite than anything else.......it's tiring business this!! Hahaha.........
I don't knowlah....just feel lethargic....and it's not like I can like rest coz it's Deepavali tom.....coz....I'VE GOT SHOOT TOMORROW!!! YAY! A shoot which I'm not getting paid for...usually it's not really an issue...but it's beginning to become one coz I do so many freebies....there's getting your name out there and there's starving........tho I'm far from starving, I can't expect to live of my parental units' money for the rest of my life no??
So yea.....I've decided to go to casting agencies.......and get Fai to check if I can get an audition with Red FM.......fingers crossed.......just hope they don't make me sign a 6-month contract, but if that's what they're offering Fai.....Hhmm..........
And sejak bila I mula panggil dia Fai ni?- Oh Sejak I got snapped out of delusions of grandeur.....
And since the fireworks have started in Kampung Cempaka.......HAPPY DIWALI PEEPS!
But really, I don't know why? Heaven knows I just got back from Singapore, tho the trip wasn't what I would call relaxing......the total bereft-ness of a tv in my hotel room is enough to stress me out right there.....but I digress.....
Perhaps it's the fact that I have a schedule now........Jap classes and rehearsals every Tuesday and Thursday....it basically locks up the entire day....coz by the time I drag myself out of bed, it's already 11-12......get ready for class....then makan after class......potter around for a bit, but i'm ussually too zonked out to potter.....so I veg, which induces more laziness and general bleghness....then it's off to rehearsals...which there seems to be an unsettling recurring pattern but let's not rant......so that leaves the weekend and odd days free....but with so many invites to stuff...and potential gatherings....it's a bit dizzy- and tire-making....with little time to recoup.....so....urgh.....
But that's life after college.......and I'm not even working a 9-5...I'm being more of a socialite than anything else.......it's tiring business this!! Hahaha.........
I don't knowlah....just feel lethargic....and it's not like I can like rest coz it's Deepavali tom.....coz....I'VE GOT SHOOT TOMORROW!!! YAY! A shoot which I'm not getting paid for...usually it's not really an issue...but it's beginning to become one coz I do so many freebies....there's getting your name out there and there's starving........tho I'm far from starving, I can't expect to live of my parental units' money for the rest of my life no??
So yea.....I've decided to go to casting agencies.......and get Fai to check if I can get an audition with Red FM.......fingers crossed.......just hope they don't make me sign a 6-month contract, but if that's what they're offering Fai.....Hhmm..........
And sejak bila I mula panggil dia Fai ni?- Oh Sejak I got snapped out of delusions of grandeur.....
And since the fireworks have started in Kampung Cempaka.......HAPPY DIWALI PEEPS!
Monday 5 November 2007
Radical Honesty
Am currently reading the fourth and totally 'unexpected' fourth book in Scott Westerfeld's Uglies trilogy....hence the 'unexpected' bit....but anyways.....in it, one of the characters, Frizz Mizuno, started a clique within the 'current' Uglies society called Radical Honesty. What Radical Honesty is, is basically honesty to the extreme Uglies style...aka you get a brain surge(surgery) that instead of making you bubbleheaded(blonde), it renders you incapable of lying.
Now there's a novel.....tho fictitious...and to a certain degree wise and noble concept....the inability to lie. It takes a brave soul to be able to do that to yourself....and stick with it, I mean.....I don't know how it's boding in the book, coz I've yet to finish it...but.......but as far as I've read, it has a far more worse effect on the non-brain-surged...I mean...how do you relate to a person who can't lie or even truth-slant(bend the truth)? Some part of you will assume that you too should be absolutely honest.
And...I'm quite taken with the idea of Radical Honesty.......especially when it comes to my non-existent love life.....I have this thing.......of telling people how I feel......Mai has called it bravery...I am sometimes tempted to call it emotional suicide.......but all the same Radical Honesty has got me thinking.....perhaps, in my next interaction with Someone, I should just practice Radical Honesty? And be absolutely frank and up front and incredibly blunt and tactless about what we are and how I feel. It'd save(or add??) me a whole lot of grief and hopefully drag Someone down with me.....
edit: actually tactlessness is already considered a character trait since I'm a Sagittarius and in reality, there's actually really something called Radical Honesty.......do you know that Scott??
Now there's a novel.....tho fictitious...and to a certain degree wise and noble concept....the inability to lie. It takes a brave soul to be able to do that to yourself....and stick with it, I mean.....I don't know how it's boding in the book, coz I've yet to finish it...but.......but as far as I've read, it has a far more worse effect on the non-brain-surged...I mean...how do you relate to a person who can't lie or even truth-slant(bend the truth)? Some part of you will assume that you too should be absolutely honest.
And...I'm quite taken with the idea of Radical Honesty.......especially when it comes to my non-existent love life.....I have this thing.......of telling people how I feel......Mai has called it bravery...I am sometimes tempted to call it emotional suicide.......but all the same Radical Honesty has got me thinking.....perhaps, in my next interaction with Someone, I should just practice Radical Honesty? And be absolutely frank and up front and incredibly blunt and tactless about what we are and how I feel. It'd save(or add??) me a whole lot of grief and hopefully drag Someone down with me.....
edit: actually tactlessness is already considered a character trait since I'm a Sagittarius and in reality, there's actually really something called Radical Honesty.......do you know that Scott??
What am I doing?!
I've recently began this little wanting to do more.....art binge....
I'd been toying with the idea of starting to do some painting and after Wayang Kata even ventured to think about writing poetry.....was even gonna go all out and buy another Moleskin notepad, specially for poetry, and books with poems by Pablo Neruda, Miguel Pinero and Chairil Anwar...not to mention finally finish reading my copy of Rimbaud's A Season in Hell. And all that on top of writing that film noir trilogy and the slasher flick.......
The screenwriting I understand...I was into that on my own....but the painting and the poetry....that's a bit on iffy ground.....I get the feeling that one of reasons I want to do it....is to just get someone to notice me......which...is sad.....
But it's not like I don't like painting...the idea of painting intrigues me...but walking through the art flea market at the Annexe this morning.....made me realise that......even if I did paint.....I have no message. And Someone......is all about messages...... which goes on into poetry......which I'd kind of already decided....wasn't my thing back in Creative Writing class with Bernice......the kind of thing I write poetry about....it's all...personal...all me, me me, me, me.........and usual, emo me..........which would of course....ultimately mean that I'd be writing poetry about Someone, for Someone, hoping that Someone would notice me.........now that's sad....and just a teeny tiny bit pathetic....yea right teeny tiny......same goes for performing on stage really....and I don't even know if that'd work......
Coz you see.....to me......站在舞台上的男人是最有魅力.....well, those who really...the stage,or whatever their medium, is their element.....people like rockstars and actors.....YiDa, NLD, JGL, Christian Bale......you know what I mean....... So to me....that is the way to catch someone's eye...be in your element...and the stage...I'd like to believe is my element.....acting is my element......
But all this is a lot of mention of me...me being selfish...it's all about me...and the ironic..is that the right word? .....the whatever thing is......Someone seems to be all about the world.....society...it's scary when we do talk...I mostly have nothing to say...I'm in awe...which is probably a bad thing.......but yea...I'm in awe.....all these ideas and thoughts about the world...and here I am little pathetic ol' me....just trying to get Someone to notice me......to like me....to....anything! me.......well not anything....anything nice........
I just think that's all rather pathetic.........I can see it for what it is...yet.......perfectly willing to get hurt.......I've said it before and I'll say it again...I'm an emotional masochist........it's what I do....it stems from watching too many idol dramas and penchant for tragic bittersweet love stories....it's I Believe........
It's "I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her."
I'd been toying with the idea of starting to do some painting and after Wayang Kata even ventured to think about writing poetry.....was even gonna go all out and buy another Moleskin notepad, specially for poetry, and books with poems by Pablo Neruda, Miguel Pinero and Chairil Anwar...not to mention finally finish reading my copy of Rimbaud's A Season in Hell. And all that on top of writing that film noir trilogy and the slasher flick.......
The screenwriting I understand...I was into that on my own....but the painting and the poetry....that's a bit on iffy ground.....I get the feeling that one of reasons I want to do it....is to just get someone to notice me......which...is sad.....
But it's not like I don't like painting...the idea of painting intrigues me...but walking through the art flea market at the Annexe this morning.....made me realise that......even if I did paint.....I have no message. And Someone......is all about messages...... which goes on into poetry......which I'd kind of already decided....wasn't my thing back in Creative Writing class with Bernice......the kind of thing I write poetry about....it's all...personal...all me, me me, me, me.........and usual, emo me..........which would of course....ultimately mean that I'd be writing poetry about Someone, for Someone, hoping that Someone would notice me.........now that's sad....and just a teeny tiny bit pathetic....yea right teeny tiny......same goes for performing on stage really....and I don't even know if that'd work......
Coz you see.....to me......站在舞台上的男人是最有魅力.....well, those who really...the stage,or whatever their medium, is their element.....people like rockstars and actors.....YiDa, NLD, JGL, Christian Bale......you know what I mean....... So to me....that is the way to catch someone's eye...be in your element...and the stage...I'd like to believe is my element.....acting is my element......
But all this is a lot of mention of me...me being selfish...it's all about me...and the ironic..is that the right word? .....the whatever thing is......Someone seems to be all about the world.....society...it's scary when we do talk...I mostly have nothing to say...I'm in awe...which is probably a bad thing.......but yea...I'm in awe.....all these ideas and thoughts about the world...and here I am little pathetic ol' me....just trying to get Someone to notice me......to like me....to....anything! me.......well not anything....anything nice........
I just think that's all rather pathetic.........I can see it for what it is...yet.......perfectly willing to get hurt.......I've said it before and I'll say it again...I'm an emotional masochist........it's what I do....it stems from watching too many idol dramas and penchant for tragic bittersweet love stories....it's I Believe........
It's "I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her."
What I did Today.....
Okay...so this is going to be a rather boring post.......for me anyways....
It's basically me...trying to wax lyrical about what I did today and the story state I find my affairs in at the moment......
So what did I do today?
Well, after finally dragging myself out of bed at like 10ish-11ish, had decided the night before, heck the entire weekend...to drop by Arts4Grabs happening at the Annexe this weekend....But I came online and discovered an event notice on Nick's new band, Three Infinity, having an Open Mic thing at Laundry at 2.....by this time it was already like 1-ish....so decided to check out NLD's new sound. So I hauled ass to the Curve. Only to get there and see Laundry looking very much....CLOSED.....Well the chairs were still stacked up outside and the shutters seemed to still be firmly attached to the ground...soo.....I'm a bit...WTF??! Unless there's another Laundry somewhere in another The Curve...but I doubt it.........so really wtf??!!
Nvm I thought....slightly cheesed off til a sign and a booth that said The Masquerade caught my eye....still slightly groggy and in need of a healthy...or perhaps hugely unhealthy dose of real life fantasy...parted with RM100 for 2 tickets to this masked shindig happening at Zouk come 26th of Nov.....have no idea who I'm taking...so I'm basically thinking I'm f*cked.
So while I was there at The Curve..I decided to catch up on a movie.....seeing that this Korean movie I've been meaning to catch was still on....I grabbed a ticket for a 535 show...the only screening left....the clock read 3pm so I hightailed it outta there and onwards to the Central Market Annexe!
At the Annexe....I bumped into a few familiar faces....had a career oriented talk with Sandra's husband.....got 'suckered' into being a flower(mascot) for Seng Tat's movie premiere on Wednesday....and bought some...'art'......which isn't really what you'd call art in like the punter sense.....art as in paintings...tho I was tempted to buy a piece but thought the better of it...coz...it's really not something I'd like to stare at for years on end......I end up buying a couple of Sabahan made beaded accessories, a "I heart KL" T-shirt and a couple of print-outs of Malaysian ghost - the pontianak and langsuir...naturally.......Was tempted to get a tee shirt for Kenny.....a porn inspired one.....but since it wasn't really his style...and he sounded weird about it on the phone...I decided...against it... plus it was RM 35 and I kinda thought I'd spent enough already at that point.... the clock struck 445 so I had to rush back to Mutiara Damansara to catch my movie...
On the way there...I did the most Mai of all things....I was already rushing at it is....afraid I'd miss I'd be late.....my mind went on auto pilot at some point and instead of taking the Penchala Link..I wound up on my way to Sentul...thanksfully I took a back road back to Hartamas and took the Penchala Link......I was still late of the movie......and I still hadn't eaten anything all day and didn't even have time to buy food......
I finished the movie...it was okay....then I came acros a little stall set up by this free chinese lifestyle mag called Spotlite.....I'd seen then at Cineleisure before....the last time was for their own private screening of Stardust for their readers......they were pluggin thier subscription again.....and since they gave you like loads of previews...I signed up for a year! Despite the fcat that I'd prolly be heading over to Taiwan in March!....tho there may be some changes on that front...again....but more on that later.....after that.....I finally headed over to Tony Roma's for some much needed sustenance....
There.......they gave lil' ol' singular me....a huge ass booth...in full view of practically everyone in the restaurant....but I took it anyway...I don't mind...it's comfy! At the end of my meal, I noticed Derek, Fai's friend sitting at a table in front of mine and he noticed me too....so I popped on over to say hi.......but left promptly after.......
So yea....that's my day.......goodnight!
It's basically me...trying to wax lyrical about what I did today and the story state I find my affairs in at the moment......
So what did I do today?
Well, after finally dragging myself out of bed at like 10ish-11ish, had decided the night before, heck the entire weekend...to drop by Arts4Grabs happening at the Annexe this weekend....But I came online and discovered an event notice on Nick's new band, Three Infinity, having an Open Mic thing at Laundry at 2.....by this time it was already like 1-ish....so decided to check out NLD's new sound. So I hauled ass to the Curve. Only to get there and see Laundry looking very much....CLOSED.....Well the chairs were still stacked up outside and the shutters seemed to still be firmly attached to the ground...soo.....I'm a bit...WTF??! Unless there's another Laundry somewhere in another The Curve...but I doubt it.........so really wtf??!!
Nvm I thought....slightly cheesed off til a sign and a booth that said The Masquerade caught my eye....still slightly groggy and in need of a healthy...or perhaps hugely unhealthy dose of real life fantasy...parted with RM100 for 2 tickets to this masked shindig happening at Zouk come 26th of Nov.....have no idea who I'm taking...so I'm basically thinking I'm f*cked.
So while I was there at The Curve..I decided to catch up on a movie.....seeing that this Korean movie I've been meaning to catch was still on....I grabbed a ticket for a 535 show...the only screening left....the clock read 3pm so I hightailed it outta there and onwards to the Central Market Annexe!
At the Annexe....I bumped into a few familiar faces....had a career oriented talk with Sandra's husband.....got 'suckered' into being a flower(mascot) for Seng Tat's movie premiere on Wednesday....and bought some...'art'......which isn't really what you'd call art in like the punter sense.....art as in paintings...tho I was tempted to buy a piece but thought the better of it...coz...it's really not something I'd like to stare at for years on end......I end up buying a couple of Sabahan made beaded accessories, a "I heart KL" T-shirt and a couple of print-outs of Malaysian ghost - the pontianak and langsuir...naturally.......Was tempted to get a tee shirt for Kenny.....a porn inspired one.....but since it wasn't really his style...and he sounded weird about it on the phone...I decided...against it... plus it was RM 35 and I kinda thought I'd spent enough already at that point.... the clock struck 445 so I had to rush back to Mutiara Damansara to catch my movie...
On the way there...I did the most Mai of all things....I was already rushing at it is....afraid I'd miss I'd be late.....my mind went on auto pilot at some point and instead of taking the Penchala Link..I wound up on my way to Sentul...thanksfully I took a back road back to Hartamas and took the Penchala Link......I was still late of the movie......and I still hadn't eaten anything all day and didn't even have time to buy food......
I finished the movie...it was okay....then I came acros a little stall set up by this free chinese lifestyle mag called Spotlite.....I'd seen then at Cineleisure before....the last time was for their own private screening of Stardust for their readers......they were pluggin thier subscription again.....and since they gave you like loads of previews...I signed up for a year! Despite the fcat that I'd prolly be heading over to Taiwan in March!....tho there may be some changes on that front...again....but more on that later.....after that.....I finally headed over to Tony Roma's for some much needed sustenance....
There.......they gave lil' ol' singular me....a huge ass booth...in full view of practically everyone in the restaurant....but I took it anyway...I don't mind...it's comfy! At the end of my meal, I noticed Derek, Fai's friend sitting at a table in front of mine and he noticed me too....so I popped on over to say hi.......but left promptly after.......
So yea....that's my day.......goodnight!
Sunday 4 November 2007
Cynicism and the art of romance....
Would it be considered cynicism if I'd rather have Mr Right Now over Mr Right, right now?
Coz the wait for Mr Right is getting a little long and arduous at the moment and with my recent fling debacle which I will conveniently pin on a well meaning friend..........screw Mr Right and bloody long term relationships......this girl just wants something....right now!
Partly I blame my impulsiveness for my fling setback......but on the other end of the spectrum.....it was probably...for the best.....NOT. Well...not right now at least.......No......who am I kidding.....I've lost one of the rare good moments in my life.......jesus...and all for what? A well meaning friend and cupcakes......jesus......Sorry Lord.....
Oh gawd do I feel stupid....and like shit........this blows........
Coz the wait for Mr Right is getting a little long and arduous at the moment and with my recent fling debacle which I will conveniently pin on a well meaning friend..........screw Mr Right and bloody long term relationships......this girl just wants something....right now!
Partly I blame my impulsiveness for my fling setback......but on the other end of the spectrum.....it was probably...for the best.....NOT. Well...not right now at least.......No......who am I kidding.....I've lost one of the rare good moments in my life.......jesus...and all for what? A well meaning friend and cupcakes......jesus......Sorry Lord.....
Oh gawd do I feel stupid....and like shit........this blows........
Monday 29 October 2007
Chivalry - Alive and Well
It's nice to know that there's someone out there who's got your back. Or has a strong enough sense of what being a gentleman is all about to be willing to punch someone out for you.
Call me psychotic, but I think that's sweet. Not to mention noble and well.....all the qualities I want in a big brother...hehe.....okaylah.....not all. But a very important bit. Hey, it shows he cares enough about you to land himself in jail. That or he's just a sociopath and mass murderer waiting to happen...and to me....that's also a good thing. hehe.....
There has been slight mentions of things of old being lost in this brave new age of ours, an age of equality and much cynicism. So it's nice to know that something like chivalry, if you'll call it that and I do, is still around and some guys still know how to be a gentleman.
Call me psychotic, but I think that's sweet. Not to mention noble and well.....all the qualities I want in a big brother...hehe.....okaylah.....not all. But a very important bit. Hey, it shows he cares enough about you to land himself in jail. That or he's just a sociopath and mass murderer waiting to happen...and to me....that's also a good thing. hehe.....
There has been slight mentions of things of old being lost in this brave new age of ours, an age of equality and much cynicism. So it's nice to know that something like chivalry, if you'll call it that and I do, is still around and some guys still know how to be a gentleman.
Sunday 28 October 2007
5 am
It' 517am and I'm sitting here...in the lounge area of my latest Singaporean boutique-ish hotel conquest - hangout @ mt.emily - too wired from reading Scott Westerfeld's Specials to sleep properly....thoughts and speech patterns of my latest movie obsession Brick racing through my brain....
I'm suppose to be up at 8-ish so that I can make full use of my stay here at hangout...since it provides me with complimentary breakfasts....but I'm just too wired to sleep....either that...or the Lemsip Max Cold & Flu pills I took for the sickness that threatened to wrack my body Friday evening's keeping me awake because of it's stupid 'non-drowsy' formula......totally bogus-making...
Specials is an awesome series.....really more that your usual YA fiction......very thinking-teen as I like to say and use nowadays....very much like Disturbia and Brick.... This should be the wave of the future....how stuff should be for teens....heavens knows we need less bubbleheads and more....
In the wake of Specials and Brick...Specials particularly...since it's got more solid of love story of sorts......I'm forced to reflect on my certain non-existent love life......as usual.......I mean what else keeps me awake at night? It's never been unfinished work....tho there has been the occasional worry about productions and the state of my non-existent career but that's for a another post....now on to the love life.......Are my standards too high? Hey I can't help it if I need a healthy dose of beauty and brains in my man....sadly tho...that combo doesn't come very often...and when it does..as it has now....there's just something abso-fuking-lutely fleeting about the f-ing encounter.......flippant almost......very short term-ish feel.......very not what I need......tho after a 6 year drought, I'm kinda in a taking whatever I can get kinda mood...... something's better than nothing, right? Tho I'm sure Mark'll beg to differ.......but he's got a girlfriend...so he's one to talk......It's not like I enjoy being an emotional masochist...tho the very word masochist means you revel in giving yourself pain.....so the above statement's an oxymoron......plus I love a good bittersweet/tragic romance as much as, and perhaps more than, the next girl......but whatever........
Okay...sleep if finally beckoning...it's either that or I was just hungry and the Ritz bits Sandwiches coupled with Pokka Green Tea's really hitting the spot......whatever it is...I'm not complaining......so off to sleep it is......
So Good Morning Singapore!
I'm suppose to be up at 8-ish so that I can make full use of my stay here at hangout...since it provides me with complimentary breakfasts....but I'm just too wired to sleep....either that...or the Lemsip Max Cold & Flu pills I took for the sickness that threatened to wrack my body Friday evening's keeping me awake because of it's stupid 'non-drowsy' formula......totally bogus-making...
Specials is an awesome series.....really more that your usual YA fiction......very thinking-teen as I like to say and use nowadays....very much like Disturbia and Brick.... This should be the wave of the future....how stuff should be for teens....heavens knows we need less bubbleheads and more....
In the wake of Specials and Brick...Specials particularly...since it's got more solid of love story of sorts......I'm forced to reflect on my certain non-existent love life......as usual.......I mean what else keeps me awake at night? It's never been unfinished work....tho there has been the occasional worry about productions and the state of my non-existent career but that's for a another post....now on to the love life.......Are my standards too high? Hey I can't help it if I need a healthy dose of beauty and brains in my man....sadly tho...that combo doesn't come very often...and when it does..as it has now....there's just something abso-fuking-lutely fleeting about the f-ing encounter.......flippant almost......very short term-ish feel.......very not what I need......tho after a 6 year drought, I'm kinda in a taking whatever I can get kinda mood...... something's better than nothing, right? Tho I'm sure Mark'll beg to differ.......but he's got a girlfriend...so he's one to talk......It's not like I enjoy being an emotional masochist...tho the very word masochist means you revel in giving yourself pain.....so the above statement's an oxymoron......plus I love a good bittersweet/tragic romance as much as, and perhaps more than, the next girl......but whatever........
Okay...sleep if finally beckoning...it's either that or I was just hungry and the Ritz bits Sandwiches coupled with Pokka Green Tea's really hitting the spot......whatever it is...I'm not complaining......so off to sleep it is......
So Good Morning Singapore!
Thursday 25 October 2007
More Poetry!
desolation
the vast emptiness of my inner sanctum
fallen angel
stripped of wings
feathers falling from wings unseen
forgotten
lost
isolation in a crowd
the need for an outlet
a scream in the dead of night
tears cloud the eye
my mind
my heart
a barren wasteland
hopelessness
desolation
isolation
here comes the light
where is the light?
i want
the dark
the cover
of night
of rain
everything means something else to someone else
the insane inane ramblings of a soul
wandering
lusting
doing nothing
wanting everything
what am i doing?
end of the road
hope?
for not……………………..?
the vast emptiness of my inner sanctum
fallen angel
stripped of wings
feathers falling from wings unseen
forgotten
lost
isolation in a crowd
the need for an outlet
a scream in the dead of night
tears cloud the eye
my mind
my heart
a barren wasteland
hopelessness
desolation
isolation
here comes the light
where is the light?
i want
the dark
the cover
of night
of rain
everything means something else to someone else
the insane inane ramblings of a soul
wandering
lusting
doing nothing
wanting everything
what am i doing?
end of the road
hope?
for not……………………..?
Poetry in Motion
Went to No Black Tie yesterday to check out Wayang Kata, now in it's fourth installment. Mostly coz Ron invited me on Facebook, then found out that Zalikha was performing...then finally that Ron was too....so it was that coupled with the party Malik invited me to next door.......so setlah.....an evening it was....
I sat there in the dimly lit No Black Tie, barely knowing a soul who was there personally, only by reputation, clinging to the tenuous connection I had to David till Ikha finished her set and I was able to move and sit with her, I absorbed the marvel that is spoken word. This is isn't my first encounter with it. I was pleasantly surprised to find out that I was there too at that inaugural spoken word event at the stiflingly stuffy and sardine packed La Bodega at Changkat Bukit Bingtang, witnessing Francesca Beard along with most of the people present at No Black Tie tonight. It didn't make me feel any easier tho. I just couldn't help feeling out of my depth. But as I sat there listening to others spout pictures made of words and watched my own junior stand up there and recite her own words, I couldn't help but be reminded that I too once dabbled oh so long ago. All that coupled with the fact that darling EuGene reminded me as much that very afternoon over MSN.....
So that got me to thinking.......and that got me to looking......I went home and looked through the stuff I had did for Bernice during that period right after that first spoken word event....remember now that she was rather disappointed that I didn't do poetry for my final assignment....hhmm..........and found my favourite one........it has no tittle...or had.....for now I've decided to give it one......I have to warn you.....it will of course be...rather.....unpolished.....but here it is anyways......
Tabako (tobacco in Japanese)
your presence reeks of tobacco,
half smoked cigarettes
under a starless sky.
the cigarettes butts smolder
in the ash tray of my life
like my affections for you.
half awake and half dead.
an on and off affair that I wish
would leave me
my dreams are plagued
by visions of you
smoking, filling my mind’s eye
with tobacco
threatening to engulf me.
it hurts my eyes and makes me
want to cry but i don’t
my eyes tear as saline threatens
to fall
i started smoking
because of you.
and countless others like you
my unattainable smoking angel army
each smelling of marlboros and dunhills
each stirring and unachievable
yet right in front of me, tempting me
i sigh as i exhale
my breath of toxic smoke.
it coils around me
like the serpent in the garden.
never letting go
I sat there in the dimly lit No Black Tie, barely knowing a soul who was there personally, only by reputation, clinging to the tenuous connection I had to David till Ikha finished her set and I was able to move and sit with her, I absorbed the marvel that is spoken word. This is isn't my first encounter with it. I was pleasantly surprised to find out that I was there too at that inaugural spoken word event at the stiflingly stuffy and sardine packed La Bodega at Changkat Bukit Bingtang, witnessing Francesca Beard along with most of the people present at No Black Tie tonight. It didn't make me feel any easier tho. I just couldn't help feeling out of my depth. But as I sat there listening to others spout pictures made of words and watched my own junior stand up there and recite her own words, I couldn't help but be reminded that I too once dabbled oh so long ago. All that coupled with the fact that darling EuGene reminded me as much that very afternoon over MSN.....
So that got me to thinking.......and that got me to looking......I went home and looked through the stuff I had did for Bernice during that period right after that first spoken word event....remember now that she was rather disappointed that I didn't do poetry for my final assignment....hhmm..........and found my favourite one........it has no tittle...or had.....for now I've decided to give it one......I have to warn you.....it will of course be...rather.....unpolished.....but here it is anyways......
Tabako (tobacco in Japanese)
your presence reeks of tobacco,
half smoked cigarettes
under a starless sky.
the cigarettes butts smolder
in the ash tray of my life
like my affections for you.
half awake and half dead.
an on and off affair that I wish
would leave me
my dreams are plagued
by visions of you
smoking, filling my mind’s eye
with tobacco
threatening to engulf me.
it hurts my eyes and makes me
want to cry but i don’t
my eyes tear as saline threatens
to fall
i started smoking
because of you.
and countless others like you
my unattainable smoking angel army
each smelling of marlboros and dunhills
each stirring and unachievable
yet right in front of me, tempting me
i sigh as i exhale
my breath of toxic smoke.
it coils around me
like the serpent in the garden.
never letting go
Paolo Plug # 2 - Bent Out of Shape by Paolo Delfino
the sunlight burns my eyes
no cure for broken pride
i've got another side
that i wanna show - to - you
been singing out of tune
can't seem to put the words in motion
been crying like a loon
bent out of shape by misdirection
and i, i said to you
i told you things that were never meant to make me hurt my pride
i've got nowhere to hide
the sunlight burns my eyes
no cure for broken pride
i've got another side
that i wanna show - to - you
you're calling it a fluke
but i never meant to let you down
i'm falling out of loop
now i've got to leave this crazy town
cos i, i said to you
i told you things that were never meant to make me hurt my pride
i've got nowhere to hide
i'm pretty sure that this won't last
i can't escape my broken past
i've got to leave this crazy town
Check out Paolo's Music on MySpace @ myspace.com/paolodelfino
no cure for broken pride
i've got another side
that i wanna show - to - you
been singing out of tune
can't seem to put the words in motion
been crying like a loon
bent out of shape by misdirection
and i, i said to you
i told you things that were never meant to make me hurt my pride
i've got nowhere to hide
the sunlight burns my eyes
no cure for broken pride
i've got another side
that i wanna show - to - you
you're calling it a fluke
but i never meant to let you down
i'm falling out of loop
now i've got to leave this crazy town
cos i, i said to you
i told you things that were never meant to make me hurt my pride
i've got nowhere to hide
i'm pretty sure that this won't last
i can't escape my broken past
i've got to leave this crazy town
Check out Paolo's Music on MySpace @ myspace.com/paolodelfino
Paolo Plug #1 - Little Things by Paolo Delfino
it's not the cars you drive
not the flashy title on your tabletop
the fancy clothes you wear or the way you do your hair up
oh i don't know, maybe it's just me
but i believe a little kid would know what to do
doesn't need that a crutch or is cos we forgot
the simple things we're meant to do
we eat and we drink
sometimes the problem is we just don't think
nobody knows
how this world got so complicated
but i'll tell right now
i don't need fancy titles or all your bling-bling
if you just can't be nice then that just doesn't swing
i don't count pennies or all the fancy things that you do
you're given a lifetime
to do the little things that you should do
won't you stay on a while
stop and smell the flowers by the roadside
martha's busy washing and she can't decide
to stay or to go
don't let me say i told you so
perhaps you thought you needed it that much
it was never meant to be this complex
living in your bottled drinks labled "life's regrets"
i haven't sold my soul yet
if only i counted the price i would pay
nobody knew
that life could be so disappointing
but i'll tell right now
i don't need fancy titles or all your bling-bling
if you just can't be nice then that just doesn't swing
i don't check ratings and i don't read your accolades
only good for a ride at the penny arcade
i don't count fame and i don't care bout the trophies you won
the end of the day you go back to square one
i don't count pennies or all the fancy things that you do
you're given a lifetime
to do the little things that you should do
Check out Paolo Delfino's music @ www.myspace.com/paolodelfino
not the flashy title on your tabletop
the fancy clothes you wear or the way you do your hair up
oh i don't know, maybe it's just me
but i believe a little kid would know what to do
doesn't need that a crutch or is cos we forgot
the simple things we're meant to do
we eat and we drink
sometimes the problem is we just don't think
nobody knows
how this world got so complicated
but i'll tell right now
i don't need fancy titles or all your bling-bling
if you just can't be nice then that just doesn't swing
i don't count pennies or all the fancy things that you do
you're given a lifetime
to do the little things that you should do
won't you stay on a while
stop and smell the flowers by the roadside
martha's busy washing and she can't decide
to stay or to go
don't let me say i told you so
perhaps you thought you needed it that much
it was never meant to be this complex
living in your bottled drinks labled "life's regrets"
i haven't sold my soul yet
if only i counted the price i would pay
nobody knew
that life could be so disappointing
but i'll tell right now
i don't need fancy titles or all your bling-bling
if you just can't be nice then that just doesn't swing
i don't check ratings and i don't read your accolades
only good for a ride at the penny arcade
i don't count fame and i don't care bout the trophies you won
the end of the day you go back to square one
i don't count pennies or all the fancy things that you do
you're given a lifetime
to do the little things that you should do
Check out Paolo Delfino's music @ www.myspace.com/paolodelfino
Monday 8 October 2007
Ramly Burger Song
Check out my friends' entry for the Drive 4 Food campaign.......
Ramly Burger Song....featuring the talents of Raz and Ryan......yes i know there are other people..but i only know these two buggers...so yea!
Ramly Burger Song....featuring the talents of Raz and Ryan......yes i know there are other people..but i only know these two buggers...so yea!
Missed the beat....
OH MY GAWD............HOW IN THE BLOODY WORLD COULD I HAVE MISSED THE HANDS PERCUSSION 10TH ANNIVERSARY SHOW? HOW WILL I EVER LIVE WITH MYSELF......
For the uninitiated...Hands Percussion is the most rocking music performance troupe in town....I mean......it's all just drums.....but wonderfully choreographed........ it's just amazing to watch!! And last weekend was their 10th annivesary show....AND I MISSED IT!!!
I was like...ooo...must go watch.....must go watch...but I completely forgot about it!!! in all the madness that was my last week.....
Please please please Hand Percussion PLEASE DO A SHOW IN GENTING..........yes...I am fully willing to pay cut throat prices to see them......they are that good.......
For the uninitiated...Hands Percussion is the most rocking music performance troupe in town....I mean......it's all just drums.....but wonderfully choreographed........ it's just amazing to watch!! And last weekend was their 10th annivesary show....AND I MISSED IT!!!
I was like...ooo...must go watch.....must go watch...but I completely forgot about it!!! in all the madness that was my last week.....
Please please please Hand Percussion PLEASE DO A SHOW IN GENTING..........yes...I am fully willing to pay cut throat prices to see them......they are that good.......
Thursday 4 October 2007
A song to Andrew.....
北極星的眼淚 - 張棟樑
作詞：李念和 作曲：戴浪 編曲：Martin Tang
像斷了線 消失人海裡面
我的眼終於失去 你的臉
＊再等一會 奢望流星會出現
願 如果真的實現 愛能不能永遠
明天 或許來不及變
但曾經走過的昨天 越來越遠
＃北極星的眼淚 說不出的想念
原來我們活在 兩個世界
北極星的眼淚 你哭紅的雙眼
被淋濕的諾言 淹沒在心裡面
我抬頭看著 愛不見
Repeat ＊,＃
當對的人 等不到對的時間
就在放開雙手的瞬間 愛撕成兩邊
Repeat ＃
整個宇宙都 流眼淚
对不起....你永远都会是我这一身中.......最要好的.....知己。
作詞：李念和 作曲：戴浪 編曲：Martin Tang
像斷了線 消失人海裡面
我的眼終於失去 你的臉
＊再等一會 奢望流星會出現
願 如果真的實現 愛能不能永遠
明天 或許來不及變
但曾經走過的昨天 越來越遠
＃北極星的眼淚 說不出的想念
原來我們活在 兩個世界
北極星的眼淚 你哭紅的雙眼
被淋濕的諾言 淹沒在心裡面
我抬頭看著 愛不見
Repeat ＊,＃
當對的人 等不到對的時間
就在放開雙手的瞬間 愛撕成兩邊
Repeat ＃
整個宇宙都 流眼淚
对不起....你永远都会是我这一身中.......最要好的.....知己。
Sunday 23 September 2007
Days of Tire and No Glory
Right....so now I have a routine....and sadly said routine has me waking before the clock hits the double digits in the morning.....a big....OH MY GAWD to the night owl/burn midnight oil clan......I barely get enough sleep from some of the worrying I do...not to mention the sleepless nights lost to depression.......I haven't seen or even talked to the new NLD for a week and I think I'm going through infatuation withdrawal symptoms coupled with PMS............
I haven't been able to put in time in GuildWars which means my Ascalonian Mesmer/Ranger is still at a lowly Level 11 and my Canthan Necromancer/Elementist is I think.....it's been a while.....at a lowly Level 13 after 5 months of play.............ooooooo it's bad..........
I've got a script to memorise....Wayang moves to figure out...costumes to buy and make.....friendship to worry about.....jobs.....and Taiwan.......
You know this Pavilion gig is starting to look like more effort than it is worth......I'm beginning to lose interest...the worSt thing that can happen.....
Urgh...it's already 2:25...and I said to myself that I'd wake up early tomorrow to go to Globe Silk Store and Masjid India to look for fabric and costumes for Lao Jiu....urgh...now that is a project I really should have thought through first before agreeing.......but that was before the Pavilion gig confirmed their rehearsal schedule.......that coupled with my Japanese classes...is insane.......if I don't go to Masjid India and Globe tomorrow...the only time I can go is........Wednesday....or Tuesday morning........or should I cancel Jap class on Tuesday? Now there's a plan.............
Frus!
I haven't been able to put in time in GuildWars which means my Ascalonian Mesmer/Ranger is still at a lowly Level 11 and my Canthan Necromancer/Elementist is I think.....it's been a while.....at a lowly Level 13 after 5 months of play.............ooooooo it's bad..........
I've got a script to memorise....Wayang moves to figure out...costumes to buy and make.....friendship to worry about.....jobs.....and Taiwan.......
You know this Pavilion gig is starting to look like more effort than it is worth......I'm beginning to lose interest...the worSt thing that can happen.....
Urgh...it's already 2:25...and I said to myself that I'd wake up early tomorrow to go to Globe Silk Store and Masjid India to look for fabric and costumes for Lao Jiu....urgh...now that is a project I really should have thought through first before agreeing.......but that was before the Pavilion gig confirmed their rehearsal schedule.......that coupled with my Japanese classes...is insane.......if I don't go to Masjid India and Globe tomorrow...the only time I can go is........Wednesday....or Tuesday morning........or should I cancel Jap class on Tuesday? Now there's a plan.............
Frus!
Tuesday 18 September 2007
Bitch of a Living
The Bitch of a Living - from Spring Awakening The Musical
by Steven Sater & Duncan Sheik - yes THAT Duncan Sheik......
MORITZ
God, I dreamed there was an angel
Who could hear me through the wall
As I cried out, like, in Latin “This is so not life at all
Help me out, out of this nightmare.”
Then I heard her silver call
She said, “Just give it time, kid. I come to one and all.”
She said, “Give me that hand, please, and the itch you can’t control.
Let me teach you how to handle all the sadness in your soul.
Oh, we’ll work that silver magic,
Then we’ll aim it all the wall.”
She said, “Love may make you blind, kid, but I wouldn’t mind at all.”
ALL
It’s the bitch of living
OTTO
The bitch, just the bitch
ALL
With nothing but your hand
OTTO
Just the bitch, yeah
ALL
Just the bitch of living
As someone you can’t stand
GEORG
See, each night it’s, like, fantastic
Tossing, turning without rest
‘Cause my days at the piano
With my teacher and her breasts
And the music’s, like, the one thing
I can’t even get at all
And those breasts!
I mean, God, please, just let those apples fall
ALL
It’s the bitch of living
OTTO
The bitch!
ALL
With nothing going on, nothing going on
Just the bitch of living
Asking: What went wrong?
Do they think we want this?
Oh, who knows!
ERNST
See, there’s showering in gym class
HANSCHEN
Bobby Maler, he’s the best
Look so nasty in those khakis
ERNST
God, my whole life’s like some test
OTTO
Then there’s Marianna Wheelan
As if she’d return my call
HANSCHEN
It’s like, just kiss some ass, man
Then you can screw ‘em all
MELCHIOR
It’s the bitch of living
And living in your head
It’s the bitch of living
And sensing God is dead
ALL
It’s the bitch of living
And trying to get ahead
It’s the bitch of living
Just getting out of bed
It’s the bitch of living
And getting what you get
It’s the bitch of living
MELCHIOR
And knowing this is it
ALL
God, is this it?
This can’t be it
Oh God, what a bitch!
Check out Spring Awakening at their website......http://www.springawakening.com/
Check out the original Spring Awakening by Frank Wedekind too.....
This is what new musicals should be all about......
by Steven Sater & Duncan Sheik - yes THAT Duncan Sheik......
MORITZ
God, I dreamed there was an angel
Who could hear me through the wall
As I cried out, like, in Latin “This is so not life at all
Help me out, out of this nightmare.”
Then I heard her silver call
She said, “Just give it time, kid. I come to one and all.”
She said, “Give me that hand, please, and the itch you can’t control.
Let me teach you how to handle all the sadness in your soul.
Oh, we’ll work that silver magic,
Then we’ll aim it all the wall.”
She said, “Love may make you blind, kid, but I wouldn’t mind at all.”
ALL
It’s the bitch of living
OTTO
The bitch, just the bitch
ALL
With nothing but your hand
OTTO
Just the bitch, yeah
ALL
Just the bitch of living
As someone you can’t stand
GEORG
See, each night it’s, like, fantastic
Tossing, turning without rest
‘Cause my days at the piano
With my teacher and her breasts
And the music’s, like, the one thing
I can’t even get at all
And those breasts!
I mean, God, please, just let those apples fall
ALL
It’s the bitch of living
OTTO
The bitch!
ALL
With nothing going on, nothing going on
Just the bitch of living
Asking: What went wrong?
Do they think we want this?
Oh, who knows!
ERNST
See, there’s showering in gym class
HANSCHEN
Bobby Maler, he’s the best
Look so nasty in those khakis
ERNST
God, my whole life’s like some test
OTTO
Then there’s Marianna Wheelan
As if she’d return my call
HANSCHEN
It’s like, just kiss some ass, man
Then you can screw ‘em all
MELCHIOR
It’s the bitch of living
And living in your head
It’s the bitch of living
And sensing God is dead
ALL
It’s the bitch of living
And trying to get ahead
It’s the bitch of living
Just getting out of bed
It’s the bitch of living
And getting what you get
It’s the bitch of living
MELCHIOR
And knowing this is it
ALL
God, is this it?
This can’t be it
Oh God, what a bitch!
Check out Spring Awakening at their website......http://www.springawakening.com/
Check out the original Spring Awakening by Frank Wedekind too.....
This is what new musicals should be all about......
Monday 17 September 2007
Of barbies, soirées and indulgences....
So yesterday's barbie ended on a mad note.....the Corporates were having a roaring time getting drunk.....Alyson was near passed out on the floor! Generally I got complements on the food...from the goat's-cheesed-filled burger patties to the humble vege skewer mushrooms....tho that could just have been Ken buttering me up for gawd knows what..........just teasing love, no!!! SAYANG..... haha....like Ken reads this blog..........but nevermind....
Aaron brought to my attention that it's pretty much been 2 years since we've first met....and since I've had a barbie for the peeps at Sunway.......and as I recall.......it's also been quite a while since I've had a barbie for any of my other social groups either......sad really since barbies at mine....is quite a fixture..in not just my mind too!...nice to know that...
Anyways.....I've been telling people who couldn't come for yesterday's shindig that I'll be having another one before I leave for Taiwan at the end of the year....but now I'm not so sure......coz truth be told......as much as I like doing the preparing for the barbie thing.....with the money I spent on this one....and my penchant for soirées.....I'm prolly better off having a party at a restaurant......Relish or Rahsia anyone? And since it's my party....maybe I can finally get Paolo Delfino and the boys to perform........okay....that maybe stretching it for a farewell party..........but yea...with the money I spent...I really might as well have a party proper......if I can afford it........
Yesterday night...or actually more precisely this morning....or actually just now...it has come to my attention........that I can be very indulgent certain people.....Aaron for instance...bunny....he doesn't walk all over me...but I actaully once beboned his Nando's for him..not to mention bought him a soft toy bunny for no other reason other than...well...it's Bunny.....now I'm on the look out for a giant pink furry one.....Aaron sized...anyone know where to get one? I pamper the chilfd...really.... Then of course, there was NLD.......I lent him verything...from car to money....yikes......then of course finally......there's new NLD...I put up with his incessant insistence that he is perfection incarnate and has prettier hair than me, his remarks on me being bourgeois, him raiding my alcohol store and.....worst of all.....creasing the spine of my book!!! Sacrilege. But I just take it in.....tho I have to admit...his does earn his keep and he himself is an indulgence on my part....so I suppose it's a fair deal........yes...the new NLD is a decadent little dish...all long bony limbs, sardonic eloquence with a highly intellectual mind to boot......all my lonely little heart could ask for....... *wink*
Speaking of indulgences...I'm currently sitting here with a box of my favourite belgian chocolates...GuyLian....you know the ones...the seashell shaped ones.......yummy......I just feel ferociously hunger...have been all evening........must be exhaustion........
Aaron brought to my attention that it's pretty much been 2 years since we've first met....and since I've had a barbie for the peeps at Sunway.......and as I recall.......it's also been quite a while since I've had a barbie for any of my other social groups either......sad really since barbies at mine....is quite a fixture..in not just my mind too!...nice to know that...
Anyways.....I've been telling people who couldn't come for yesterday's shindig that I'll be having another one before I leave for Taiwan at the end of the year....but now I'm not so sure......coz truth be told......as much as I like doing the preparing for the barbie thing.....with the money I spent on this one....and my penchant for soirées.....I'm prolly better off having a party at a restaurant......Relish or Rahsia anyone? And since it's my party....maybe I can finally get Paolo Delfino and the boys to perform........okay....that maybe stretching it for a farewell party..........but yea...with the money I spent...I really might as well have a party proper......if I can afford it........
Yesterday night...or actually more precisely this morning....or actually just now...it has come to my attention........that I can be very indulgent certain people.....Aaron for instance...bunny....he doesn't walk all over me...but I actaully once beboned his Nando's for him..not to mention bought him a soft toy bunny for no other reason other than...well...it's Bunny.....now I'm on the look out for a giant pink furry one.....Aaron sized...anyone know where to get one? I pamper the chilfd...really.... Then of course, there was NLD.......I lent him verything...from car to money....yikes......then of course finally......there's new NLD...I put up with his incessant insistence that he is perfection incarnate and has prettier hair than me, his remarks on me being bourgeois, him raiding my alcohol store and.....worst of all.....creasing the spine of my book!!! Sacrilege. But I just take it in.....tho I have to admit...his does earn his keep and he himself is an indulgence on my part....so I suppose it's a fair deal........yes...the new NLD is a decadent little dish...all long bony limbs, sardonic eloquence with a highly intellectual mind to boot......all my lonely little heart could ask for....... *wink*
Speaking of indulgences...I'm currently sitting here with a box of my favourite belgian chocolates...GuyLian....you know the ones...the seashell shaped ones.......yummy......I just feel ferociously hunger...have been all evening........must be exhaustion........
Saturday 15 September 2007
Game and Action..........
Oh and did I mention I got some last weekend........? ; ]
Despite a rocky start..........
Despite a rocky start..........
The Vapidity of Life
From the Merriam Webster Online Dictionary -
vapid
Pronunciation: \ˈva-pəd, ˈvā-\
Function: adjective
Etymology: Latin vapidus flat-tasting; akin to Latin vappa flat wine and perhaps to Latin vapor steam
Date: circa 1656 : lacking liveliness, tang, briskness, or force : flat, dull (a gossipy, vapid woman, obsessed by her own elegance — R. F. Delderfield) (London was not all vapid dissipation — V. S. Pritchett)
synonyms see insipid
— va·pid·ly adverb
— va·pid·ness noun
-----------------
That is not to say that my life....is vapid...far from it...my life.....is rather emo....
But vapidity is what one would expect from beauty queens...no? I mean if you make it your life's career to be a beauty queen.....vapidity is bound to follow........having to look pretty all the time.....does 'wonders' for the brain cells one must think......at least...that was what I was half expecting going into a beauty pageant myself.....
My, how low must one stoop to fulfill one's dreams of stardom, some might say.......and perhaps that is in part...true.......the Asian entertainment industry is nothing if not superficial........beauty queen turn actresses are a dime a dozen.......whether they are good actresses...actors!....is another matter all together...and more often than not....unimportant.....
I'm pleased to say tho...that I was.........partially wrong...for the most part.......there are bevies of young women with reasonable good heads on their rather well adjusted shoulders.......and I've got to admit...you have to respect them........it's takes quite something to do what they do......and competition is at times harsh....and totally unfair.....
But enough about that and being philosophical....and back to me......
Today was a emo day for me...and I have to thank Paolo Delfino but especially his Short-Attention-Span Band for helping to cheer me up.....you guys may not of course realise it....but I was really bummed before coming to the show.......but good music's always good for the soul....and so was hanging out with EuGene, Edwin and Anne after the show...... ; D
Truth be told......hanging out with Z prolly would have done the trick too........but boy, you need to get it together man! Sorry mate I tried......I got all dolled up for near nothing!!! YOU OWE ME Z!!! Plus I really wanted to see Twilight Action Girl!!!
But how the evening eventual transpired was still great........nothing beats just plain hanging out and getting to know new people....and getting dish about others.......
FYI Ed, and I know you read this sometimes......what I didn't say at the mamak just now was...... tho from EuGene's teasing you might have gathered.....I had a thing for JC for a while.....okay, quite a while....but really, with his antics, which sane girl wouldn't??!!!...it's actually one of the reasons I came for that gig at JamAsia that first time.......but I'm glad I went coz you guys are awesome...and I really mean it......I heart you guys man......but anyways.....so yea...I had a thing......but I'm no longer in the fan club coz I got shot down.......so right now...I'm kind of keeping my distance........so yea........but then...that shouldn't really be that big of a revelation should it?? hehe......this is a 'public' blog afteral.........and somethings I just can't say.....coz it's not my place......
Okay....enough about that........here's a plug......
If you aren't coming to my party tomorrow...or tonight.....that's the 15th..........GO CHECK OUT PAOLO DELFINO at BB Park at like....9-ish pm...........coz they rock!....in a mellow sorta way......
Eugene, Anne and Edwin..............WE ARE SSSOOOOOO GOING KARA SOON!!!! *wink*
vapid
Pronunciation: \ˈva-pəd, ˈvā-\
Function: adjective
Etymology: Latin vapidus flat-tasting; akin to Latin vappa flat wine and perhaps to Latin vapor steam
Date: circa 1656 : lacking liveliness, tang, briskness, or force : flat, dull (a gossipy, vapid woman, obsessed by her own elegance — R. F. Delderfield) (London was not all vapid dissipation — V. S. Pritchett)
synonyms see insipid
— va·pid·ly adverb
— va·pid·ness noun
-----------------
That is not to say that my life....is vapid...far from it...my life.....is rather emo....
But vapidity is what one would expect from beauty queens...no? I mean if you make it your life's career to be a beauty queen.....vapidity is bound to follow........having to look pretty all the time.....does 'wonders' for the brain cells one must think......at least...that was what I was half expecting going into a beauty pageant myself.....
My, how low must one stoop to fulfill one's dreams of stardom, some might say.......and perhaps that is in part...true.......the Asian entertainment industry is nothing if not superficial........beauty queen turn actresses are a dime a dozen.......whether they are good actresses...actors!....is another matter all together...and more often than not....unimportant.....
I'm pleased to say tho...that I was.........partially wrong...for the most part.......there are bevies of young women with reasonable good heads on their rather well adjusted shoulders.......and I've got to admit...you have to respect them........it's takes quite something to do what they do......and competition is at times harsh....and totally unfair.....
But enough about that and being philosophical....and back to me......
Today was a emo day for me...and I have to thank Paolo Delfino but especially his Short-Attention-Span Band for helping to cheer me up.....you guys may not of course realise it....but I was really bummed before coming to the show.......but good music's always good for the soul....and so was hanging out with EuGene, Edwin and Anne after the show...... ; D
Truth be told......hanging out with Z prolly would have done the trick too........but boy, you need to get it together man! Sorry mate I tried......I got all dolled up for near nothing!!! YOU OWE ME Z!!! Plus I really wanted to see Twilight Action Girl!!!
But how the evening eventual transpired was still great........nothing beats just plain hanging out and getting to know new people....and getting dish about others.......
FYI Ed, and I know you read this sometimes......what I didn't say at the mamak just now was...... tho from EuGene's teasing you might have gathered.....I had a thing for JC for a while.....okay, quite a while....but really, with his antics, which sane girl wouldn't??!!!...it's actually one of the reasons I came for that gig at JamAsia that first time.......but I'm glad I went coz you guys are awesome...and I really mean it......I heart you guys man......but anyways.....so yea...I had a thing......but I'm no longer in the fan club coz I got shot down.......so right now...I'm kind of keeping my distance........so yea........but then...that shouldn't really be that big of a revelation should it?? hehe......this is a 'public' blog afteral.........and somethings I just can't say.....coz it's not my place......
Okay....enough about that........here's a plug......
If you aren't coming to my party tomorrow...or tonight.....that's the 15th..........GO CHECK OUT PAOLO DELFINO at BB Park at like....9-ish pm...........coz they rock!....in a mellow sorta way......
Eugene, Anne and Edwin..............WE ARE SSSOOOOOO GOING KARA SOON!!!! *wink*
Sunday 19 August 2007
B*itch Crazy Week(end)
Gawddamnit! I'm tired.........It's been....a mad (couple of) week(s).......so many things happened that I have no idea where to start an update....
But let's start with the biggest ball in the court.......Miss Malaysia Chinatown International 2007.
I have no real idea how I feel about it.......to say I'm excited.....I'm not really.....but I do realise that it's a great oppurtunity. I wanna win it so bad. The chance to go to Japan is just tooo..... tempting..... I mean come one! JAPAN!! Plus it's one of those things that'll look good on a actor's CV......perhaps it is not as prestigious as Miss World. But it's an oppurtunity all the same. I'm done with letting oppurtunities pass me by no matter how insane they make my life seem.
Getting a hold of all the dresses has been the maddest thing of all........it's damn tiring running around finding proper dresses okay? Plus the limited budget.....
It's not all that bad really...I still have a life....I still see people.......I still...get game as Sums calls it....haha.........perhaps not the kind of game I like but still game.......tho I am getting the kind of game I like too.......hahah.....
Then there's the improv show with Qahar.....auditions happened over 2 weekends and we're still short and undecided over people to join us. We've still got a proposal to submit but hopefully it's in the bag......
Also I've been hanging around Siang's friends quite a bit.....having lunch with corporate types is rather fun......hehe.....plus it broadens my social circle which is rather nice. They're a fun bunch of people so it's cool.....heck was even gonna spend the night with them on two occasions but didn't in the end.....one of them being last night at Siang's farewell party....since there was no where to sleep I decided to just hightail it home at around 530am. Plus I was on this sudden emo trip so it prolly would have dragged everyone down anyways.....
Made myself wake up at 12 this morning to go get jewelery from Sums....after reaching home at like 6-ish....people kept sms-ing me at like 9 am......disrupting sleep......blardy people....now am a bit stoned.....
Oh...and I got an new 80G ipod in Singapore...not to mention a whole load of dvds in JB.......and a new laptop case for me Fijutsu tablet.......me gonna get a gelaskin for me new ipod and next time I'm in Sg...gonna get me a fancy ipod pouch and some pretty earphones......hehe...
Okies.....my brain is crumbling from sleep deprivation...........I need to continue this another day.........
But let's start with the biggest ball in the court.......Miss Malaysia Chinatown International 2007.
I have no real idea how I feel about it.......to say I'm excited.....I'm not really.....but I do realise that it's a great oppurtunity. I wanna win it so bad. The chance to go to Japan is just tooo..... tempting..... I mean come one! JAPAN!! Plus it's one of those things that'll look good on a actor's CV......perhaps it is not as prestigious as Miss World. But it's an oppurtunity all the same. I'm done with letting oppurtunities pass me by no matter how insane they make my life seem.
Getting a hold of all the dresses has been the maddest thing of all........it's damn tiring running around finding proper dresses okay? Plus the limited budget.....
It's not all that bad really...I still have a life....I still see people.......I still...get game as Sums calls it....haha.........perhaps not the kind of game I like but still game.......tho I am getting the kind of game I like too.......hahah.....
Then there's the improv show with Qahar.....auditions happened over 2 weekends and we're still short and undecided over people to join us. We've still got a proposal to submit but hopefully it's in the bag......
Also I've been hanging around Siang's friends quite a bit.....having lunch with corporate types is rather fun......hehe.....plus it broadens my social circle which is rather nice. They're a fun bunch of people so it's cool.....heck was even gonna spend the night with them on two occasions but didn't in the end.....one of them being last night at Siang's farewell party....since there was no where to sleep I decided to just hightail it home at around 530am. Plus I was on this sudden emo trip so it prolly would have dragged everyone down anyways.....
Made myself wake up at 12 this morning to go get jewelery from Sums....after reaching home at like 6-ish....people kept sms-ing me at like 9 am......disrupting sleep......blardy people....now am a bit stoned.....
Oh...and I got an new 80G ipod in Singapore...not to mention a whole load of dvds in JB.......and a new laptop case for me Fijutsu tablet.......me gonna get a gelaskin for me new ipod and next time I'm in Sg...gonna get me a fancy ipod pouch and some pretty earphones......hehe...
Okies.....my brain is crumbling from sleep deprivation...........I need to continue this another day.........
Saturday 18 August 2007
The New NLD
What is it with me and younger guys? Personally…..first NLD and now the new ‘NLD’, who hereby shall not be named to protect the innocent…..and by innocent, I mean me…as he is more than capable of using said information against me….Then on the rabid fan girl side...there’s a whole host of cute young spunky munchkins to ogle…..oh how glad am I that 熬犬 is older than me……
Is it maternal instinct kicking in? Or is it a Mrs Robinson syndrome? Who knows……..just be thankful it’s not as cradle snatching as last time! Jeez Louise…..5 years?! Sheesh!
Now the reason behind the madness……everyone who reads my blog should know it by now…..the pageant…..am tempted to call it bloody….but let’s not bite the hand that feeds you…..But it is damn 麻烦……I mean 3 evening gowns and 3 cocktail dresses in a week…..REALLY??!!! Thank goddess for Avee……she’s a lifesaver! I owe you so much, love! And Alan is a sweetheart from all the contact I’ve had with him……I’ll admit…I’m probably driving him up the wall! I know me…….I even drive Baks up the wall and he already has his hands full with Ju…..
I binge think and drive myself crazy over thinking and stressing over seeming little details……my immediate reaction after getting the list of stuff I need to get ready for the pageant? Stress….call Baki for emotional support and have him go….”okay babe. Don’t freak out. Stop stressing. Take a deep breath and relax… I’ll be back in KL tomorrow and we meet up okay?.....I know you, you start stressing and then you start crying.” and there I was on the verge of tears on the phone. But like a trooper I sucked it up and stuck it out. And now here we are……..post 5 impromptu vocal lessons, 2.5 evening dresses, 1 bikini and .5 cocktail dresses down the road with 5 days to go before the pageant. Alan said he’d help with the stuff I still don’t have, Avee’s helping to extend that dress, I’m buying that Ted Baker number, and contemplating on the RM500 mod cocktail (dress).
Justin.
Yes, Fai…..one of this year’s Cleo Bachelors and last year’s Female Most Gorgeous Man. Justin it seems was one of the few people who took the Cleo thing seriously……may seem trivial to most people….but I mean…..this is what we do. But to a certain extent…I have to agree with the masses…it’s the Cleo Bachelors……it’s just a lark…plus….IT’S RIGGED!! Rigged so badly it’s like a politician on graft, sure thing. Don’t believe me? Check out all the past winners……..and then check out the cover of the issue when they were introduced…who I wonder is on the cover? Rigged or not? You decide.
Now why does that bring me back to Fai? Simple we both take these things seriously….which got me to thinking that we might be quite alike…..are we Sums?? Thos you might say you can’t be sure coz you don’t know him well…….I think we are in some ways….He thinks doing all this prep work for going on radio is grief he doesn’t need….much like my attitude with certain things to…Tracy and Amal and ssooo attest to that……we’re both pretty westernised….tho so is 1/2 the world but let’s not go there…..Britain played impotant parts in our lives,,,,,okay I just might be strstching it a bit on that one…….but I mean…attitude wise….our goals…..years ago, my goals were just like his…all over the place….actor-singer-fashion designer……….tho it’s still pretty much the same now… tv-stage-film-malaysia-taiwan-japan-scriptwriter-producer-baker/restaurantier… but I’d like to think, I have more…….vision? driven goals?....focus than I did a couple of years ago…..haha…it makes me sound so old compared to Fai, who in actual fact is like 3 years my senior……..but in certain ways….I do feel older….and somehow wiser…..he’s like this big child………
So now we’re back at the new ‘NLD’…things with him are so different.....where as in the past i was at thier beck and call...it's more of a 2 way thing with this at the moment......but the relationship whatever it turns itself out to be is still fledgling at best....so let's not jump to conclusions and jinx anything....
Saturday 4 August 2007
Courage
It wouldn't be fair to my memory to go without mentioning this....
If they ever ask me.....they being the panel from Miss Chinatown or Miss International...or actually anyone really, journalists, TV hosts......If they were to ever ask me....what is the bravest thing you've ever done in your life?
I'd say, confess my feelings to the boy that I like. Okay...it actually sounds way better in chinese.....coz it's like 2 words.....告 白 ......coz well....perhaps it's just me....but I think you need to have a lot of courage to do that....
Sure...it's not as noble as saving a child from a burning building or climbing a tree to save a kitten. It may not seem as 'facing your fears' as going bungee jumping (which i have done) or eating worms (again I have also done) but hey, you're facing one of the biggest and scariest fears of all.....the fear of reject.
The fear of rejection is the one fear that somewhat tops it all. It's what stops you from wearing that loud oufit that you so absolutely love but you know eveyone will say looks lala. It's what stops you from asking questions in 'public' situations.......you fear of being rejected for being seen as stupid....It's what makes you conform and shy.........rejection comes in many forms shapes and sizes...the one everyone thinks of is rejections in love, as it's the most obvious. But conforming to peer pressure is also a result of the fear of rejection. Japan is one master example. The nail that sticks out must be hammered back into place. MUST BE HAMMERED...........now talk about your fear of rejection.........
But whatever.......so yea. Overcoming your fears......so what if I went in half knowing the answer already. At least you know where you stand.
If they ever ask me.....they being the panel from Miss Chinatown or Miss International...or actually anyone really, journalists, TV hosts......If they were to ever ask me....what is the bravest thing you've ever done in your life?
I'd say, confess my feelings to the boy that I like. Okay...it actually sounds way better in chinese.....coz it's like 2 words.....告 白 ......coz well....perhaps it's just me....but I think you need to have a lot of courage to do that....
Sure...it's not as noble as saving a child from a burning building or climbing a tree to save a kitten. It may not seem as 'facing your fears' as going bungee jumping (which i have done) or eating worms (again I have also done) but hey, you're facing one of the biggest and scariest fears of all.....the fear of reject.
The fear of rejection is the one fear that somewhat tops it all. It's what stops you from wearing that loud oufit that you so absolutely love but you know eveyone will say looks lala. It's what stops you from asking questions in 'public' situations.......you fear of being rejected for being seen as stupid....It's what makes you conform and shy.........rejection comes in many forms shapes and sizes...the one everyone thinks of is rejections in love, as it's the most obvious. But conforming to peer pressure is also a result of the fear of rejection. Japan is one master example. The nail that sticks out must be hammered back into place. MUST BE HAMMERED...........now talk about your fear of rejection.........
But whatever.......so yea. Overcoming your fears......so what if I went in half knowing the answer already. At least you know where you stand.
Ouch!
Right...someone remember to NOT buy roses......pruning them to vase them hurt....those bitches have really huge thorns!!
So.....my day started with me waking up lazily to attend a film workshop I signed up for a while back......I perhaps should have just saved the effort....most of what the workshop was about I've already covered in classes with Bernice......but whatever......well..not really...I could actually have gone to Melaka and PD with Siang's bunch...and I was kinda looking forward to getting sloshed with that bunch......they seem nice.....operative word being seem...but whatever....we make choses and we live the consequences.
But going for the workshop wasn't an absolute total loss...seeing as I was in the Petaling Street areA...I thought I might as well just go and check out my idol drama shop at S&M Arcade.....came out with quite a number of buys...no sight of YiDa's drama...but slowlylah.....
Then again, since I was in the area went to buy fresh flowers for the house.....hence the now pin cushioned thumb........ouch is an understatement.....okay....I'm sure pretty soon....Baks will prolly say something about buying the right flowers or something to that effect....hahha.......I wanted to buy tuber roses love, but they were out! These small roses looked pretty so I thought I get them.......should have just bought the eustomas......ouw!!!
And since I went to buy flowers....I popped around the corner and got meself some durian puffs.....cold durian puffs....yummy!! Hehe.....
Right.....so that was my......morning? afternoon?? haha........whatever.....right now I'm 'forced'...or more forcing myself actaully.... to sit nest to me radio listening to Justin DJ alone on RedFM...okay...is it just me....or does the boy have this weird lithe that comes on?? It's almost freaky in that it makes him resemble Amber Chia in movies!! YIKES!! FAI SNAP OUT OF IT!!! haha...ha...ha........now how do you break this to a Virgo?
So.....my day started with me waking up lazily to attend a film workshop I signed up for a while back......I perhaps should have just saved the effort....most of what the workshop was about I've already covered in classes with Bernice......but whatever......well..not really...I could actually have gone to Melaka and PD with Siang's bunch...and I was kinda looking forward to getting sloshed with that bunch......they seem nice.....operative word being seem...but whatever....we make choses and we live the consequences.
But going for the workshop wasn't an absolute total loss...seeing as I was in the Petaling Street areA...I thought I might as well just go and check out my idol drama shop at S&M Arcade.....came out with quite a number of buys...no sight of YiDa's drama...but slowlylah.....
Then again, since I was in the area went to buy fresh flowers for the house.....hence the now pin cushioned thumb........ouch is an understatement.....okay....I'm sure pretty soon....Baks will prolly say something about buying the right flowers or something to that effect....hahha.......I wanted to buy tuber roses love, but they were out! These small roses looked pretty so I thought I get them.......should have just bought the eustomas......ouw!!!
And since I went to buy flowers....I popped around the corner and got meself some durian puffs.....cold durian puffs....yummy!! Hehe.....
Right.....so that was my......morning? afternoon?? haha........whatever.....right now I'm 'forced'...or more forcing myself actaully.... to sit nest to me radio listening to Justin DJ alone on RedFM...okay...is it just me....or does the boy have this weird lithe that comes on?? It's almost freaky in that it makes him resemble Amber Chia in movies!! YIKES!! FAI SNAP OUT OF IT!!! haha...ha...ha........now how do you break this to a Virgo?
Friday 3 August 2007
30 Hour Famine....
So anyone up for 30 Hour Famine?
What is it?
Check the site out.....
Malaysia
International
So any takers?
I'm gonna try to do it this year...I mean why not...it's for a good cause......
See you there!
What is it?
Check the site out.....
Malaysia
International
So any takers?
I'm gonna try to do it this year...I mean why not...it's for a good cause......
See you there!
What's Up With Me......
Right...so blogger friends have been complaining that I don't post as often as I should and have......well...only one person but what the hell.......so.....what's been going on in Amelia-dom?
Been making it a habit to drop by KLCC for lunch with the rat pack bunch every Friday now...and I find KLCC very very boring now...after just spending 2 Fridays there.......I mean...what else is there to do there? The shops are.....the same as those you'd find in 1U..and that's so much more loser....They do have Kino....but still.......Plus the drive there is actaully quiet insane....all the way for lunch? I am going loco.....
OH MY GAWD!!! DEAN FUJIOKA TATSUO IS IN THE BLOODY COUNTRY??!!!! WHERE THE FU*K IS HE??!!!!! I WANT TO SHAG HIM!!! I DON'T GIVE A DAMN!!! want proof? DEAN FUJIOKA TATSUO YOU GET YOUR BUTT BACK TO KL AND TELL ME WHERE YOU'RE BLOODY STAYING!!!! OH MY GAWD!!!!
And what is this about YiDa having shot a drama in Shanghai??!! What the?? In December 2005 somemore.......and I only read about it now on his blog.....YIDA!!! I WANNA SEE YOU ACT....well to see if you can act.....ooo!!!! here is it.....right.....a trip to my ori serial provider is in order then...........S&M Arcade here I come!!!
Okay....are you as bored as I am? I am....and slightly pissed off! Coz my friend just FFK-ed me a ride into KL.....I'm like HELLO!!! Now only you say...I know you were reluctant...but really!! After saying okay....STICK TO YOUR WORD MAN! Now I asked Justin to come already...you tell me you don't want to go liao! What is this??? If you'd told me earlier...I would have stayed in town!!! Gawd damnit Siang! You yang intro kawan-kawan anda pada aku...s'krang aku nak hang out dengan mereka......argh!!! Infuriating.......if you really didn't want to go....say so....atau not sure if you're really going pun!.....let people know that you might back out! Don't say okay...okay I'll come then finally say not going! I mean WHAT THE F**K?!!
But whatever........we'll see how it goes...maybe I'll just drive my ass back into KL......but driving is so tiring.......and I've driven so much already...and...and.......urgh.......YIN SHAO SIANG!!!!!!!!!
Been making it a habit to drop by KLCC for lunch with the rat pack bunch every Friday now...and I find KLCC very very boring now...after just spending 2 Fridays there.......I mean...what else is there to do there? The shops are.....the same as those you'd find in 1U..and that's so much more loser....They do have Kino....but still.......Plus the drive there is actaully quiet insane....all the way for lunch? I am going loco.....
OH MY GAWD!!! DEAN FUJIOKA TATSUO IS IN THE BLOODY COUNTRY??!!!! WHERE THE FU*K IS HE??!!!!! I WANT TO SHAG HIM!!! I DON'T GIVE A DAMN!!! want proof? DEAN FUJIOKA TATSUO YOU GET YOUR BUTT BACK TO KL AND TELL ME WHERE YOU'RE BLOODY STAYING!!!! OH MY GAWD!!!!
And what is this about YiDa having shot a drama in Shanghai??!! What the?? In December 2005 somemore.......and I only read about it now on his blog.....YIDA!!! I WANNA SEE YOU ACT....well to see if you can act.....ooo!!!! here is it.....right.....a trip to my ori serial provider is in order then...........S&M Arcade here I come!!!
Okay....are you as bored as I am? I am....and slightly pissed off! Coz my friend just FFK-ed me a ride into KL.....I'm like HELLO!!! Now only you say...I know you were reluctant...but really!! After saying okay....STICK TO YOUR WORD MAN! Now I asked Justin to come already...you tell me you don't want to go liao! What is this??? If you'd told me earlier...I would have stayed in town!!! Gawd damnit Siang! You yang intro kawan-kawan anda pada aku...s'krang aku nak hang out dengan mereka......argh!!! Infuriating.......if you really didn't want to go....say so....atau not sure if you're really going pun!.....let people know that you might back out! Don't say okay...okay I'll come then finally say not going! I mean WHAT THE F**K?!!
But whatever........we'll see how it goes...maybe I'll just drive my ass back into KL......but driving is so tiring.......and I've driven so much already...and...and.......urgh.......YIN SHAO SIANG!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday 1 August 2007
I need a Boyfriend
Or a reasonable facsimile.....
I think it's high time I got me ass a boyfriend.......either that....as I concluded while trying to plan out this post in my mind.....a friend with benefits......
Now Sumies is going to go....oh...don't go there.........but I'm like......well.....I don't know...haha...
But you see...all I want/need is just....someone to come home to...be it my home or his...hahah.....someone to cuddle with....sleep with at night......or do the occasional in-out-in-out with....as Alex calls it.....hey I'm only human......generally doing everything lovey-dovey that couples do....
Really though...I'm just tired of F-ing going it alone......I've done it for most of my life, being an only child......and probably will for the other rest of it.....so where are those little oasis of solace that you eventually find every five years or so??
Now those of you who are my friend should feel sufficiently indignant and go.......hey? what am I then? Chopped liver?!.........No......you are not chopped liver...I hate liver......but it's just not the same....and you know it's true!
I think it's high time I got me ass a boyfriend.......either that....as I concluded while trying to plan out this post in my mind.....a friend with benefits......
Now Sumies is going to go....oh...don't go there.........but I'm like......well.....I don't know...haha...
But you see...all I want/need is just....someone to come home to...be it my home or his...hahah.....someone to cuddle with....sleep with at night......or do the occasional in-out-in-out with....as Alex calls it.....hey I'm only human......generally doing everything lovey-dovey that couples do....
Really though...I'm just tired of F-ing going it alone......I've done it for most of my life, being an only child......and probably will for the other rest of it.....so where are those little oasis of solace that you eventually find every five years or so??
Now those of you who are my friend should feel sufficiently indignant and go.......hey? what am I then? Chopped liver?!.........No......you are not chopped liver...I hate liver......but it's just not the same....and you know it's true!
as tagged by Sums......
1. Have you ever seen your best friend cry?
Yes
2. Have you ever cried in an airport?
Er...I think I might have...
3. Last person to make you laugh?
I cannot remember.....most probably Justin and his silly antics...since he's the last person I saw...no wait...it was Qahar...
4. What was funny?
We were trying this really lame but hilarious improv while trying to work out our next show....
5. Favorite John Mayer song?
Daughters
6. Scariest movie?
Sound of Music.....THE HILLS ARE ALIVE!!!
7. Last thing to bother you?
My Inner Demons.
8. Last person to text you?
Jean
9. Last time you went looking for new clothes?
Monday. Jeans at KLCC.
10. What happened last March?
Internship at KLPac......I can't remember personal stuff....but most likely...one sided drama involving psychic vampire....then Baki.....
11. Last person to tell you they miss you?
Tracy
12. What bothers your mom the most?
That I like going out late.
13. Who will be your next kiss?
With my luck it won't even be romantic......
14. Where do you see yourself in 8 years?
Myself? Everyone will be able to see where I am in 8 years.........world famous.
15. Your first thought in the morning?
Wei Ling? Argh........
16. Last dream you had?
I cannot remember....
17. Ever cried yourself to sleep?
Oh....plenty o times......
18. Ever been in love?
Perhaps. I conceed......
19. Last time you had a 4 hour talk with someone?
I really do not think I've had one.......tho....it sounds like a Jon thing....
20. Do you have a Friendster?
Course I do.......I do Facebook too.....
21. Do you believe in stupid questions?
Depends on who’s asking.
22. Where are you now?At home?
At Home.....
23. Last time you danced?
Really danced? About a month and a half ago....someone take me clubbing!!!! NOW!
24. The person that taught you how to swim?
Mr.......Chin? Chan? Long time already wei.....who remembers??
25. What’s your ring tone?
Call Me When You're Sober, Evanescence
26. Do you own an iPod?
A Nano....
27. Speak any other languages?
Course I do! I'm Malaysian Chinese!
28. What’s your middle name?
Ru Hui....if you mean the other kind...I have no idea..........anyone?
29. How many schools have you been too?
6......does kindy count?
30. Who from your top friends have you known the longest?
Li Yen
31. Lalala?
Kiki Lala?
32. Do you like the “Brianstorm” song?
Brainstorm Song? Apa tu?
33. Where were you the first time you heard the song “Asereje“?
I can't even recall the song?!!
34. Hardest class?
Statistics in A levels....or was it Advanced Math
35. How old were you when you went on your first date?
17
36. Who’s your celebrity crush?
Jonathan Rhys Meyers
37. Last thing you bought?
3 pints of Baskin Robbins, Maui Brownie Madness, Rainbow Sherbet and Chocolate Chip
And finally I tag........YOU.
ps: who the hell came up with this???? Chain Blogging? whatever will they think of next?
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